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CHILDREN ARE GOD’S GIFT YOU ARE JUST A CUSTODIAN

CHILDREN ARE GOD’S GIFT YOU ARE JUST A CUSTODIAN. GIVE CHILDREN NOT YOUR VALUES BUT GOD’S VALUES. OUR WORDS AND DEEDS SHOULD BUILD THEM CONSTRUCTIVELY. THREE MAIN APPROACHES FOR CHILD – ADULT INTERACTION.

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CHILDREN ARE GOD’S GIFT YOU ARE JUST A CUSTODIAN

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  1. CHILDREN ARE GOD’S GIFTYOU ARE JUST A CUSTODIAN

  2. GIVE CHILDREN NOT YOUR VALUES BUT GOD’S VALUES

  3. OUR WORDS AND DEEDS SHOULD BUILD THEM CONSTRUCTIVELY

  4. THREE MAIN APPROACHES FOR CHILD – ADULT INTERACTION

  5. SRICTNESS●Order without freedom(Excessive control) ●No choices ●“You do it because I said so”.

  6. PERMISSIVENESS ●Freedom without order(No limits) ●Unlimited choices ●“You can do anything you want”

  7. POSITIVE DISCIPLINE ●Freedom with order(Authoritative; kindness and ●Limited choicesFirmness at the same time) ●“You can choose within limits that show respect for all.”

  8. The Four R’s of Punishment • 1. Resentment – “This is unfair. I can’t trust adults.” 2. Revenge – “They are winning now, but I’ll get even.”3. Rebellion – “I’ll do just the opposite to prove I don’t have to do it their way.”4. Retreat: a. Sneakiness – “I won’t get caught next time.” b. Reduced self-esteem – “I am a bad person.”

  9. The four Criteria for Effective Discipline • 1. Is it kind and firm at the same time? (Respectful and encouraging) • 2. Does it help children feel a sense of belonging and significance? (Connection) • 3. Is it effective long-term? (Punishment works in the short term, but has negative • long-term results. • 4. Does it teach valuable social and life skills for good character? (Respect, concern for • others, problem solving, accountability, contribution, cooperation)

  10. Four Steps for Winning Cooperation • Express understanding for the child’s feelings. Be sure to check with him or her to see if you are right.

  11. . Show empathy without condoning. Empathy does not mean you agree or condone. It Simply means that you understand the child’s perception. A nice touch here is to share times when you have felt or behaved similarly.

  12. Share your feelings and perceptions. If the first two steps have been done in a Sincere and friendly manner, the child will be ready to listen to you.

  13. . Invite the child to focus on a solution. Ask if he has any ideas on what to do in the Future to avoid the problem. If he doesn’t, offer some suggestions until you can reach an agreement.

  14. BASIC ADLERIAN CONCEPTS • 1. Children Are Social Beings. • 2. Behavior Is Goal Oriented. • 3. A Child’s Primary Goal Is to Belong and Feel Significant. • 4. A Misbehaving Child Is a Discouraged Child. • 5. Social Responsibility or Community Feeling. • 6. Equality. • 7. Mistakes Are Wonderful Opportunities to Learn • The Three R’s of Recovery from Mistakes • 1. Recognize – “Wow! I made a mistake. • 2. Reconcile – “I apologize.” • 3. Resolve – “Let’s work on a solution together.” • 8. Make Sure the Message of Love Gets Through.

  15. A Misbehaving Child is a Discouraged Child.

  16. Mistakes Are Wonderful Opportunities to Learn The Three R’s of Recovery from Mistakes 1. Recognize – “Wow! I made a mistake. 2. Reconcile – “I apologize.” 3. Resolve – “Let’s work on a solution together.”

  17. . A Child’s Primary Goal is to Belong and Feel Significant

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