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Secret Social Spy Academy. Parent Workshop 2013 Afternoon Session 2, Week 2. Adolecent Group: (Ms. Erhart/Pacha) Continue Zones of Regulation & Crime Time Thought bubbles Lies Friendship Unit Continue to discriminate between f Friend and DNEIRF Continue Friendship PEER-A-MID

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Secret Social Spy Academy

Parent Workshop 2013

Afternoon Session 2, Week 2


  • Adolecent Group: (Ms. Erhart/Pacha)

  • Continue Zones of Regulation & Crime

  • Time

  • Thought bubbles

  • Lies

  • Friendship Unit

    • Continue to discriminate between f

    • Friend and DNEIRF

    • Continue Friendship PEER-A-MID

    • Continue Friendship files

  • Goin’ Fishing, Keeping them “Hooked”,

  • Magnet communication

Lessons/Concepts of the Week

Transition Group: (Ms. Coppla)

Continue Big/Medium/Small Problems, Smart/Wacky Guesses, & Zones of Regulation, Reading someone’s Plan

Thought Bubbles

Jr. Crime time- Learning to solve problems

Friendship unit

Continuing to discriminate between friend and non friend (DNEIRF)

Role playing expected/unexpected friendship behaviors

Friendship Jeopardy

Lies


Thought Bubbles


Thought Bubbles


Thought Bubbles


Thought Bubbles


Thought Bubbles


CRIME TIME


The Situation

ROB

Kate

Rob and Kate were going to play a video. Rob had the remote control. Kate got mad and

yelled , “Give it to me NOW! I WANT to go first!”


Kate

Rob

THE CRIME SCENE


“Give it to me NOW! I WANT to go first!”

THE CRIME SCENE cont…


WHAT SIZE WAS ’s KATE’S REACTION?

THE CRIME SCENE cont…

What is the actual level of the problem?


WHAT DO YOU THINK THEY ARE THINKING?

THE CRIME SCENE cont…


FACE

*

*

*

*

*

*


What tone of voice?

Happy tone

Sad tone

Angry tone


BODY LANGUAGE

*

*

*


VERDICT

GUILTY

INNOCENT


How could the problem be solved?

LET’S ROLE-PLAY!


Liar Liar


WHITE LIES

A lie that is told to avoid hurting someone else’s feelings.

It is a partial lie and it does not hurt people. This type of lie

usually does not have consequences.

GRAY LIES

A lie that is told to be funny or sarcastic . This type of lie

does not hurt people. This type of lie has moderate

consequences.

Black Lies

A lie that is told to hurt people (blatant lie). This type of

lie has severe consequences.


What type of Lie?

I think your hair looks cool!

WHITE LIES

Black Lies


What type of Lie?

I didn’t take your toy.

WHITE LIES

Black Lies


What type of Lie?

“Uh…yeah mom, this looks yummy”

WHITE LIES

Black Lies


When you might use a white lie?

?

Your friend Tom asks you if you like his new shirt. You think it is pretty ugly.


When would you might use a white lie?

?

Your Uncle Joe is singing a song and his voice sounds terrible. He asks you what

You think.


When you might use a white lie?

?

Your friend gets a new hairstyle and asks you what you think.


What do you say?

What do you think about my

Hair?

Looks terrible,

Get a haircut.

I love the color!

It is totally

uneven!


What do you say?

“Doesn’t this look

Delicious?

Aunt Beth,

It is totally burnt!

No way am I eating that Aunt Beth.

Looks great, thanks Aunt Beth.


What do you say?

You did that on purpose!!!!

You JERK!

“OOPS!!! Sorry Kathy, I wasn’t looking where I was going”

That’s ok.


GRAY LIES

TYPE 1: IDIOMS

Idioms are words, phrases, or expressions that cannot be taken literally. In other words, when used in everyday language, they have a meaning other than the basic one you would find in the dictionary.


GRAY LIES

TYPE 1: IDIOMS

Example:

“Break a Leg”

?

Good luck


GRAY LIES

TYPE 2: SLANG

(sometimes referred to as a type of idiom)

An informal use of vocabulary

A kind of language occurring in casual and playful speech, deliberately used in place of standard terms for added humor.


GRAY LIES

TYPE 2: Slang

Example:

“Chill out”

?

Relax, take it easy


Goin’ Fishin’


Goin’ Fishin’

  • Having a conversation with someone is

    like goin’ fishin’. We want to think about

    the person.

  • We need to be able to “bait” the person by using our words.

  • You have to find the right location, have the right bait and line, patience, and be aware of how the fish is responding.


Choosing Your Words Carefully!

  • It’s not that you can never talk about certain topics. It’s that you have to talk about them carefully.

  • You have to monitor your comments while other people think about what you might be saying.

  • This means you have to self-monitor your behavior and watch what you say.

  • What you say can be a:

    • Bait and Brag

    • Bait and Comment

    • Bait and Support

    • Bait and Lie

    • Bait and Getting Flung Overboard


Bait and Brag

  • This is NOT highly recommended as a strategy to encourage success.

  • This is where you introduce a topic and then tell people how wonderful you are.

  • Example:

    • I go so many new clothes this weekend and they were all from really nice, expensive stores.


Bait and Comment

  • This strategy helps you to introduce a topic to others.

  • This is where you introduce the topic, but then you just talk about it. You provide information that does not make you look fabulous.

  • Example:

    • I went shopping this weekend at the mall.


Bait and Support

  • This strategy is usually pretty successful.

  • This is where you introduce the topic, but then you want to find out about how other people think.

  • Example:

    • I went shopping this weekend at the Stanford Mall. Do you like to go there?


Bait and Lie

  • Not recommended!!

  • When you introduce a topic and then lie about what happened or didn’t happen to make yourself look better to that person.

  • Example:

    • I went to the library over the summer and read every fiction book in the whole place.


Bait and Getting Flung Overboard

  • When you introduce a topic and give too much information at one time.

  • Example:

    • “I went to the mall and I went into Old Navy and got some jeans, then I went to the food court and got a slice of pizza. The pizza had pepperoni and tomato sauce and sausage. It was really hot…”


I got an A+ on my test! I am so excited! I didn’t even study for it. What did you get?

B

Bait and Brag

Bait and

Comment

Bait and Lie

Bait and Support

Bait and Get

Flung Overboard


Keepin ‘em Hooked


Keepin’ em Hooked

  • Pick a topic you think the other person would

    be interested in or a topic you know both of

    you like to talk about.

  • Don’t bore the person by doing an “all me all the time” conversation (like talking for too long or only talking about what you want to talk about).

  • Make 2 or 3 comments and ask the other person about whatever you’re talking about.

  • Every time you ask the person a question, you “hook” him and bring him back to the conversation.

  • Watch the person’s face and expression to see if he is still interested.

  • If he is not, hook him in again with a new topic.


Keepin ‘em Hooked

(Think of a topic you think your partner is interested in and write it

it in the first box. Then place a “hook” picture in the second box

for each hook you make.)

Topic

Hook


Magnet Communication


Magnet Communication

  • We are like magnets

  • We can do and say things with our body, eyes, and words, that make people want to be around us (to attract them)

  • We can do and say things with our body, eyes, and words, that push people away (repel them)

  • You have the power to be like a magnet and bring people close to you!


Magnet CommunicationRULES

ATTRACT people in a conversation

REPEL people in a

conversation

Being critical or negative

Not agreeing

Arguing

Interrupting

Being TOO sarcastic

Mean tone and attitude

Saying “nothing” as a response

Rolling your eyes

Ignoring people

Being too serious all the time

Poking people

Timing of humor

Repeating what everyone says

Talking about only what YOU want to talk about.

  • Say things that show that you know what your peers like or are interested in

  • Look at your peers when you are in a conversation with them

  • Keep your brain thinking about them

  • Point your body towards them


Friend File Report

Read the fact and determine who the friend fact belongs to. Some might have more than one choice if people have something in common.


MAP IT OUT- Social Behavior Map


MAP IT OUT- Social Behavior Map


MAP IT OUT- “on the fly”


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