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Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse

Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse. 2 Samuel 13. Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse. Presented by Robert W. Kellemen, Ph.D. RPM Ministries

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Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse

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  1. Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse 2 Samuel 13

  2. Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse Presented by Robert W. Kellemen, Ph.D. RPM Ministries Comprehensive, Compassionate, Culturally-Informed Biblical Counseling

  3. A Tale of Two Counselors • Pastoral Counselor: A Sermon on Sin • Professional Counselor: Too Damaged to Love • What is your assessment? • What do you base your assessment upon?

  4. The Central Message of the Bible • God’s Mission Statement: • “I Am Indispensable” • Central Message of Biblical Counseling: • …we apply Christ’s grace to deal both with the evils we have suffered and the sins we have committed.

  5. Comprehensive Biblical Counseling • Dealing with Suffering: • God is good even when life is bad. • Dealing with Sinning: • God is gracious even when I am evil.

  6. Central Message of 2 Sam. 9-1 Kgs. 2 • Man after God’s own heart . . . • Is a maze of suffering and a mess of sin. • Davidic narrative points to our need for God’s indispensable grace! • Grace is God’s medicine of choice for our suffering and sin.

  7. Understanding the Damage Done • Why? • We need a theology of suffering. • We need a picture of Satan’s strategy.

  8. Stage One • The damage of the loss of trust • The attempted Satanic destruction of faith • Exegetical Markers • Shrewdness of Satan • Conclusion of Victim: Disgrace/Desolate • Image: Door of Heart Bolted Shut

  9. Stage Two • The damage of powerlessness • The attempted Satanic destruction of hope • 13:2 • 13:11—hazaq • 13:12 • 13:14 • Image: Death of Dreams

  10. Stage Three • The damage of being used and feeling useless • The attempted Satanic destruction of love • Used • 13:14 • 13:15 • Useless • Bolts Door • 13:17 • 13:18-19 • Image: Torn Robes

  11. Stage Four • The damage of shame • The attempted Satanic destruction of peace/ shalom • Hebrew Shame • Self • Social • Modern Shame • Self • Social • Image: Downcast Eyes

  12. Summary of Biblical Sufferology • Loss of faith: Doors closed • Loss of hope: Dreams killed • Loss of love: Robes torn • Loss of peace: Eyes downcast

  13. Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse • Soul Care for Suffering: • Life is bad, but God is good • Sustaining: It’s normal to hurt • Healing: It’s possible to hope

  14. Stage One • Sustaining Trust: Offering faith in the midst of doubt • How NOT to Sustain Trust • Don’t Victimize the Victim… • Don’t Communicate: “Be quiet!” • Don’t Communicate: “Don’t take this to heart!”

  15. Stage One • How to Sustain Trust: Biblical, Christlike Empathy • Engage in Compassionate Listening • Give voice back • Listen to actions • Listen to tears

  16. Stage One • Share Sorrows • Empathize with the external evil • Empathize with the internal damage • Counsel like the inspired narrator: Enter desolation • Trialogue • The Image: Comforter…

  17. Stage Two • Healing Powerlessness: Offering hope in the goodness of God in the midst of the badness of life • Give their name back! • Journey with them • Explore God’s Good Purposes: Grace/Truth • Provide Tastes of God’s Goodness: Grace/Love • Trialogue • Image: Champion

  18. Stage Three • Reconciling the Soul to the Savior: Offering Christ’s grace for our disgrace • Spiritual Direction for Sinning • Reconciling: It’s horrible to sin, but wonderful to be forgiven • Guiding: It’s supernatural to mature

  19. Stage Three • How NOT to Reconcile • Not like the father • Not like the brother • How to Reconcile • Call the abuse sin • Work through forgiveness… • Seek justice, not vengeance

  20. Stage Three • How to Reconcile • Explore and Expose . . . • Fallen agenda • Fallen pathways • Idol of the heart • Repentance • Putting Off

  21. Stage Three • How to Reconcile • Prescribe grace • Defeat the lie of worldly shame • The Image: Care-fronter

  22. Stage Four • Guiding the Soul to Godly Service: Offering beauty for ashes • Envision with spiritual eyes • Empower to put on King’s robes • In Christ: Saint • To Christ: Son/Daughter

  23. Stage Four • Guiding the Soul to Godly Service: Offering beauty for ashes • Enlighten to Mature Wisdom • Image: Coach

  24. Send Them Out with GRACE God’s Prescription for Disgrace

  25. Grace: God’s Prescription for Disgrace Understanding and Ministering to Victims of Sexual Abuse 2 Samuel 13

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