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Elaborate!

Elaborate!. Mr. Scanlon’s 7 th Grade Class. What is the difference between a score of “3” (non-proficient) and a score of “4” (proficient) on a demand writing? Elaboration!. Elaborate (verb) - to add details to; expand; describe more fully.

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Elaborate!

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  1. Elaborate! Mr. Scanlon’s 7th Grade Class

  2. What is the difference between a score of “3” (non-proficient) and a score of “4” (proficient) on a demand writing? Elaboration!

  3. Elaborate (verb) - to add details to; expand; describe more fully.

  4. One way to elaborate is to provide a detailed description of each element in your writing. This is a good time to use your five senses. Think of this as going “wide” in your elaboration.

  5. Basic idea She ate an apple, and it had a worm in it!

  6. Elaborate idea The apple was bright green, its skin polished and shining as it nestled in the fruit bowl (sight). The scent was fresh, as though the fruit had just been plucked from the tree (smell). She took it from the bowl, her fingers closing around the firm smooth skin (touch) as she lifted it to her lips.

  7. Elaborate idea (cont.) The apple crunched loudly (sound) as her teeth cut through the skin into the tart, juicy flesh (taste). As the fresh juice ran down her throat she noticed a small black speck moving slowly in the creamy flesh. Closer inspection revealed that she hadn't just taken a bite from the apple - she'd bitten through a fat, juicy worm.

  8. It’s pretty obvious which one will get a higher score, isn’t it?

  9. Use your adjectives!

  10. Another way to elaborate is to go “deep” instead of “wide.”

  11. Follow the chain of cause and effect to go “deep.” Every effect is also a cause! Cause>effect (new cause)>effect (new cause)>effect

  12. Cause and effect: go deep!

  13. How can I use this? Prompt –discuss how you would be affected if your school adopted a uniform. Uniform>second set of clothes>more money>parents work more hours>less time at home>breakdown of the American family

  14. Now you try it… Describe the last meal you had. (One paragraph) Go wide! (provide a full description with many details)

  15. Now you try it… What will happen if you fail to get a proficient score on demand writing? Go deep! (Show a chain of cause and effect)

  16. Now you try it… Describe one of your favorite places to visit. (One paragraph) Go wide! (provide a full description with many details)

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