Raising Your Children

1. Raising Your Children • Who’s Wisdom are you following… • Man’s or God’s? • 1 Cor 2:13-14

2. Today’s Discussion • History of modern parental practices • Man’s Discipline vs God’s Discipline • How to Raising Godly Children • Final Considerations

3. How did we get here? • In 1946, Dr Benjamin Spock published his infamous book… “Common Sense Book of Baby and Child Care” • Since 1960 the rate of Violent Crimes has tripled • Children are murdering children, their teachers and parents • Teenage mothers are disposing of their babies in trashcans

4. How did we get here? • Since the Sexual Revolution of the ‘60s • It’s estimated 1 in 4 teenage girls have had a STD • In the past 5 decades, the number of distinct STD’s has risen from 5 to more than 50 • Obsession with sexual violence has brought about a 318% increase in sexual assault

5. What You May not Know About Dr Spock? • He felt his approach was a ''practical application'' to the ideas propounded by two early 20th-century sages, Sigmund Freud and John Dewey • The doctor was arrested at various protest demonstrations. • Dr. Spock was the Presidential candidate of the People's Party, a coalition of left-wing organizations • He raised his own children strict and to be polite and obedient • He noticed adverse effects in mothers & children after authoring his book

6. Cause & Effect • In the ‘60s parents watched their children become sassy and contentious • Crime rates began to clime & SAT decline • How could Dr Spock’s book have such an affect? • His website claims it is 2nd in sales only to the Bible. 50M sold in 42 languages • Among the 100 most influential people

7. Cause & Effect • Dr Spock was aware of his negative influence upon parenting • In 1968 he told NY Times his 1st edition contributed to permissive parenting • He said “Parents began to be afraid to impose on the child in any way” • He tried to remedy this by emphasizing the need for “setting standards” and “asking for respect” in his 2nd edition

8. Cause & Effect • Since Dr Spock’s radical ideas, an industry of “Experts” have jumped on the bandwagon • These experts have promoted their own version of “Indulgent Child Rearing” • Parenting approaches that foster narcissism & contempt for authority have become widely accepted • In 1968 he said that he would “be proud if the idealism and militancy of youth today were caused by my book”

9. Man’s vs God’s Plan for Discipline

10. Man’s Plan for Discipline • Ignore the Child • Give your child some space • Create a diversion • Discipline w/o spanking • Find out what is really frustrating your child • Hugs • Offer Food or Recommend Some R&R • Give Your Kid an Incentive to Behave • Speak Calmly • Laugh It Off • Get Out of There

11. God’s Plan for Discipline • Ps 103:13 • Pro 1:8 • Pro 11:29 • Pro 12:1 • Pro 13:1 • Pro 17:25 • Pro 19:20 • Pro 22:6 • Pro 24:3-4 • Pro 29:15 • Mk 3:25 • Eph 6:1, 4 • Col 3:20-21 • Tit 2:4-5

12. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear Him • Ps 103:13

13. My son, hear the instruction of your father, And do not forsake the law of your mother; • Pro 1:8

14. He who troubles his own house will inherit the wind, And the fool will be servant to the wise of heart. • Pro 11:29

15. Whoever loves instruction loves knowledge, But he who hates correction is stupid • Pro 12:1

16. A wise son heeds his father's instruction, But a scoffer does not listen to rebuke • Pro 13:1

17. A foolish son is a grief to his father, And bitterness to her who bore him • Pro 17:25

18. Listen to counsel and receive instruction, That you may be wise in your latter days • Pro 19:20

19. Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it • Pro 22:6

20. Through wisdom a house is built, And by understanding it is established; By knowledge the rooms are filled With all precious and pleasant riches • Pro 24:3-4

21. The rod and rebuke give wisdom, But a child left to himself brings shame to his mother • Pro 29:15

22. And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand • Mrk 3:25

23. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. • Eph 6:1

24. And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord • Eph6:4

25. That they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed • Tit 2:4-5

26. God’s Thoughts on Spanking • Deu 8:5 • Deu 21:18 • Pro 10:13 • Pro 13:24 • Pro 15:10 • Pro 17:10 • Pro 19:18, 25, 29, 30 • Pro 22:6, 15 • Pro 23:13-14 • Pro 26:3 • Pro 29:15, 17 • Heb 12:5-11

27. God’s Design in Discipline • Bring about change of Behavior (Pro 6:23, Pro 19:15, 18) • To Develop a Conscience (Pro 23:13-14, 2 Cor 7:8-11) • To Demonstrate Love & Concern for the Child (Pro 13:24, Heb 12:8, Rev 3:19) • To Develop an Understanding of Wrong (Jam 5:16, 1 Jn 1:9)

28. Bipolar or Spoiled The symptoms, which are regarded as evidence of bipolar disorder, usually are what most people recognize as ordinary belligerence. Children who have anger outbursts, who refuse to go to bed, who are moody and self-centered under the current standard of care in child psychiatry are being diagnosed with bipolar disorder. To most rational human beings, these behaviors describe an ill-mannered, immature and poorly disciplined child. Nonetheless, the temper tantrums of belligerent children are increasingly being characterized by doctors as the mood swings of bipolar disorder.   Instead of grooming, feeding and educating the next generation of Americans to be the fittest, brightest, most competent contributors on the planet, we have indulged, placated and spoiled our children into dysfunctional misfits. We are teaching our children to use a psychiatric diagnosis to excuse their antisocial behaviors. This will inevitably lead to a greater reliance on psychiatric medications, which unfortunately do not endow an individual with improved self-control or maturity. Dr. Elizabeth J. Roberts, Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist

29. Raising Godly Children

30. Tips To Raise Godly Children • Love them with All Your Heart (Tit 2:4) • Teach them the Bible (Psa 78:5-7; cfEph 6:4; 2 Tim. 3:14-15) • Discipline them Properly (Pro 13:24, Eph 6:4) • Take them to Church (Psa 122:1) • Be a Good Example (Joh 13:15) • Show them the Right Priorities (Mat 6:33, Luk 14:26) • Lead them to Christ! (Rom 1:16)

31. Raising Your Children Some Final Considerations

32. Children are more influenced by sermons you act than by sermons you preach - David McKay

33. Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

34. Your children will become what you are; so be what you want them to be - DavidBly

35. It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men - Fredrick Douglas

36. It is my view that our society can be no more stable than the foundation of individual family units upon which it rests Our government, our institutions, our schools, our way of life are dependent on healthy marriages and loyalty to the vulnerable little children around our feet - JamesDobson

37. Don't worry that children never listento you; worry that they are always watching you - RobertFulghum

38. He who loves his son will whip him often, so that he may rejoice at the way he turns out. He who disciplines his son will profit by him, and will boast of him among acquaintances. He who teaches his son will make his enemies envious, and will glory in him among his friends. When the father dies he will not seem to be dead, for he has left behind him one like himself, whom in his life he looked upon with joy and at death, without grief. He has left behind him an avenger against his enemies, and one to repay the kindness of his friends. Whoever spoils his son will bind up his wounds, and will suffer heartache at every cry. An unbroken horse turns out stubborn, and an unchecked son turns out headstrong. Pamper a child, and he will terrorize you; play with him, and he will grieve you. Do not laugh with him, or you will have sorrow with him, and in the end you will gnash your teeth. Give him no freedom in his youth, and do not ignore his errors. Bow down his neck in his youth, and beat his sides while he is young, or else he will become stubborn and disobey you, and you will have sorrow of soul from him. Discipline your son and make his yoke heavy, so that you may not be offended by his shamelessness. Better off poor, healthy, and fit than rich and afflicted in body. Health and fitness are better than any gold, and a robust body than countless riches. There is no wealth better than health of body, and no gladness above joy of heart. Death is better than a life of misery, and eternal sleep than chronic sickness. • The Holy Bible: New Revised Standard Version. (1989). • (Sir 30:1–17). Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers

39. Train up a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it. - KingSolomon

40. What We Discussed • History of modern parental practices • Man’s Discipline vs God’s Discipline • How to Raising Godly Children • Final Considerations

41. God’s Plan for Salvation