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Conflict as Opportunity - managing conflict and creating a healthy climate for the exchange of information and understanding. Mediation serious staff conflicts alternative to disciplinary action “insider neutrals” transferable skills.

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Conflict as Opportunity

- managing conflict and creating a healthy climate for the exchange of information and understanding


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  • Mediation

  • serious staff conflicts

  • alternative to disciplinary action

  • “insider neutrals”

  • transferable skills


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At ISP we believe that conflict is neither good nor bad but natural. We seek to create an open community, climate and culture that is able to embrace diverse perspectives and approaches. We expect differences to be expressed respectfully and we intend for each member of our community to develop the ability to listen to, hear and acknowledge different points of view”.


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Mediating serious interpersonal conflicts

Creating a climate that deals openly with conflict

Learning to become better at managing difficult conversations and crucial confrontations


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  • Situations

  • When did I handle conflict well?

  • When did it go wrong?


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Crucial Conversations

Crucial Confrontations


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  • Talking to colleagues about offensive behaviour

  • Critiquing a colleague’s work

  • Talking to a team member not keeping commitments

  • Talking to a colleague about a personal problem

  • Giving boss feedback about behaviour

  • Approaching boss who is breaking own principles


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Challenging conversations:

Why might it go wrong?

- design fault?


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Reason and Emotion

Fight or Flight?

The Amygdala


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Difference is………….

- how you respond when things go wrong

- how you handle difficult situations or conversations



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Causes of Conflict . . .

Assumption

Appreciation

Acknowledgement

Respect

Resources


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Active Listening

Being Heard

Positions v Interests


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  • Assuming that others do things because its in their make-up or they actually enjoy doing them and then ignoring any other potential motivational forces - is a mistake.

  • Psychologists classify this mistake as an attribution error. And because it happens so consistently across people, time and places, it is called the

  • Fundamental Attribution Error

Crucial Conversations: Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler. 2002


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  • Me v You or they actually enjoy doing them and then ignoring any other potential motivational forces - is a mistake.

  • Situational v Dispositional


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The Pool of Shared Meaning or they actually enjoy doing them and then ignoring any other potential motivational forces - is a mistake.


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Successful communication - free flow of information or they actually enjoy doing them and then ignoring any other potential motivational forces - is a mistake.

Freely shared feelings, opinions, theories - even when controversial or unpopular

Safe for everyone to add their meaning to the pool



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  • Dark waters? Switzler. 2002

    • Silence - disengagement,

    • avoidance,

    • hints,

    • sarcasm


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Violence Switzler. 2002

verbal attacks,

discrediting others,

subtle manipulation,

getting others to mistrust


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Learn to Look Switzler. 2002

Monitor the pointers……………

Crucial Conversations: Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler. 2002


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  • Step out of the issue Switzler. 2002

  • Check what aspect of safety is at risk -

  • mutual purpose?

  • mutual respect?

Make it safe!


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  • Fix it - Switzler. 2002

  • Apologise

  • Contrast to Clarify

  • Find and Commit to a mutual purpose

  • Return to the issue and brainstorm strategies

Make it safe!


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Monitor the pointers…………… Switzler. 2002

Crucial Conversations: Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler. 2002


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Find your bearings…………….. Switzler. 2002

  • Start with the Heart

  • Focus the Brain

  • Master My Stories


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  • Crucial Conversations: Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler. 2002

  • Crucial Confrontations: Patterson, Grenny, McMillan, Switzler. 2005

  • vitalsmarts.com

  • The Mediation Handbook; Beer, Stief.1997

  • Mediation for Managers: John Crawley, Katherine Graham, www.conflictmanagementplus.com

  • The Fifth Discipline Fieldbook; Senge, Kleiner, Roberts, Ross and Smith. 1994


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