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Funny quotes from funny people

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Funny quotes from funny people

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  1. Funny quotes from funny people

  2. Looking for a bit of laughter to lighten your day? Look no further than these funny quotes from these funny folks, selected by the Readilly review team. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” — Mark Twain “You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” — Winston Churchill “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” — Zig Ziglar "Hope for the best, expect the worst. Life is a play, we're unrehearsed." “I’ve come to view Jesus much the way I view Elvis. I love the guy but the fan clubs really freak me out.” — John Fugelsang “Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.” — Woody Allen “The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless.” — Nicolas Chamfort "It may look like I'm doing nothing, but in my head, I'm quite busy." “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” — Thomas A. Edison “My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.” — Mike Myers “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” — Winston Churchill "Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life." "If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur." — Doug Larson

  3. “I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.” — Woody Allen "I am not special, I'm just a limited edition." “I am only human, although I regret it.” — Mark Twain "With great power comes great electricity bill." “If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.” — Johnny Carson "Life is a one-time offer, use it well." "The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." — Dolly Parton "So it turns out being an adult is mostly just googling how to do stuff." “Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard.” — Margaret Culkin Banning "The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so." — Gore Vidal "Life is like an onion; you peel off a layer at a time and sometimes you weep." — Carl Sandburg "The most wasted of all days is one without laughter." — E. E. Cummings Find tons more humour over at Readilly today.

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