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Knowledge Card 2 Compilation. 481-DL Fall 2010. Seek clarification to increase your understanding of another’s mental frame ~ Nicole Wayne. “When you don't know something, say that you don't know. That is knowledge” Confucius Thought for the Day: Seek clarification Daily Action Item:
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Knowledge Card 2 Compilation 481-DL Fall 2010
Seek clarification to increase your understanding of another’s mental frame ~ Nicole Wayne “When you don't know something, say that you don't know. That is knowledge” • Confucius Thought for the Day: Seek clarification Daily Action Item: Restate the sender's feelings or ideas, to ensure understanding of their view
Express Empathy By Avoiding The Last Word ~ Paul Kuo “Perhaps the last word is best unspoken!”- Kathy McAfee Thought for the Day: Inappropriate statements can ricochet and do damage to professional relationships, so I must distinguish intention from behavior. Daily Action Item: In the midst of conflict or disagreement, before I express the “last word”, I will ask myself, “What else could this behavior mean?”.
Appreciate your customer’s mental frame to influence behavior ~ Jeremiah Rothschild “Behavior is the mirror in which everyone shows their image.” Recognize to modify. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Thought for the Day: Determine a customer’s personal and professional motivations to understand what makes them tick in order to align their goals with yours. Daily Action Item: Ask customer to articulate vision (on reverse side). Be sure to: •Capture their requirements •Restate their need to demonstrate understanding to customer
Ask the Right Question and Gain Insight ~ SuziBirz “Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.” – Anthony Robbins THINK Asking the right questions provides the opportunity for a person to share their mental frame. DO During conversations or meetings, I will dig deeper and ask, “Help me understand. What do you have in mind?” (I will do this even if the answer seems obvious to others.)
Use Active Listening to Help Others Break Mental Blocks ~ Allison Foil “Motivation can’t take you very far if you don’t have the legs.” - Lance Armstrong THINK To change the mental frame of not training in the off season, we must understand what makes cyclists stop training in the winter; therefore, we should actively listen to the athletes to identify their trigger point. DO Actively listen to cyclists by recording their ideas for a winter training plan in a journal and present it back to them to get buy-in and influence change. By getting the athlete’s input and providing feedback in a journal, it serves as a trigger point to help them become personally committed to the plan and find the motivation to attack the mental block.
Influence the Outcome by Listening to Understand ~ Linda Vind “Before I can walk in another’s shoes, I must first remove my own” Unknown THINK To reframe another’s thinking, you need to understand their point of view. Don’t let personal assumptions get in the way. DO Practice setting aside your bias and focus on the message when listening to others. Remind yourself that your goal is to understand their perspective and not insert your own.
Reassert the Goal from Team Members’ Perspectives to Keep Motivation Current ~ Nicki Cliffer "Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success" -Henry Ford Think: Judicious reminders of the shared goal (the ‘WIFM’) and how each stakeholder reframes that goal in meeting their group’s needs, will help motivate the group to work together. Do: For every Stakeholder Group meeting: Start meetings by asking one stakeholder (someone different each meeting) to talk about how the project’s goal will work from their point of view, and and how it also integrates into the common goal. Have them send a slide to be included into the meeting’s presentation.
Listen actively to all voices involved to capture each stakeholder’s frame of mind ~ Nicki Cliffer • To listen is an effort, and just to hear is no merit. A duck hears also.” -Igor Stravinsky • Think: Searching for feedback from many views and voices will aid in reframing perspectives, and lead to superior processes, service, products, and increased customer satisfaction. • DO: Prior to every stakeholder workgroup meeting: Poll all stakeholders on 1 or 2 questions pertaining to the upcoming meeting. Share the results during the next meeting.[It is also helpful to send a reminder 2-3 hours before the meeting thanking people for their responses, reminding them of the meeting’s agenda, and that the polling responses will be shared at the meeting.] • Note: As an example of the second knowledge card, before the most recent stakeholder working group meeting, I asked each working group member to vote on which workflow for a particular aspect of the project on-boarding process (method 1 or method 2) worked better for them. During the meeting, I displayed the results, discussed each method’s pros and cons, and asked what the barriers were to adopting the method I hoped would be adopted. As a result of the discussion, the group was able to reach consensus because their needs, once understood, would be met. The polling method ensured both that all voices would be heard, and raised interest in attending the meeting. The attendance of all interested stakeholders was vital in ensuring that once consensus was reached, there would be buy-in from all parties.
Initiate a Questioning Attitude to Reframe Unawareness ~ Tammy Gray “The creative individual has the capacity to free himself from the web of social pressures in which the rest of us are caught. He is capable of questioning the assumptions that the rest of us accept.” ~ John W. Gardner THINKInitiating a discussion with questions to an associate when his/her decision may threaten patient safety is a good way to understand someone’s mental frame and a first step to influence. DOChallenge daily assumptions made by approaching the associate to ask if I may be of help (e.g. offer to monitor the patient left alone in a bed in the hallway), ask what precipitated the event, and further elicit alternative strategies he/she thinks would be safer.
Reframe “I can’t do it thinking” with “yes you can” ~ Andrew James “Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing”-Muhammad Ali THINK Negative attitudes often result from fear of the unknown and unfamiliarity of a subject matter. DO When I meet resistance from trainees, and negative comments such as “I can’t do this” or “this is too difficult” emerge, I will help trainees breakdown the learning process in small parts until they achieve competency.
Restate their words for a clearer picture of what they are saying – Amanda Banks “To listen well is as powerful a means of communication and influence as to talk well.” – John Marshall THINK Understanding someone’s words offers you a new perspective by uncovering their mental frame and reframing your interaction. DO Restate the speakers words using phrases such as “What I am hearing you say is…”.
Understand Others to Influence Them ~ Jacqueline Jarrell (Griffin) We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak. ~EpictetusThink: Refrain from telling YOUR story. Let those you want to influence, tell their stories, and establish trust.Do: When compelled to tell your story, jot it down as a note, and continue to listen to your team. Encourage someone to share their thought or a story by asking, "Does anyone have an experience similar to this from which we could all benefit?"
Listening is the First Step Towards Influence ~ Malvi Patel “The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” -Ralph Nichols THINK: To influence an outcome, we must understand others. To understand someone's mental frame, actively listen to them. DO: Today at a meeting, practice active listening by asking one question to clarify what has been stated.
Read body language to predict other's mental frame, mood and thinking process ~ Patricia Wadas "Feelings are 55%, body language 38%, tone and words 7%" Unknown Source Thought for the Day: You can reframe the way that you persuade and influence others more effectively by doing things that are in harmony with their present state of mind. Daily Actions: Note how close a person is to you, look into their eyes, check their arm positioning , watch their feet and note nervous gestures.
Achieve Empathy by Courteous Listening ~ Barbara Kapelman There cannot be greater rudeness than to interrupt another in the current of his discourse.John Locke Think: Being interrupted feels disrespectful and belittles one’s feelings and opinions. Do: •Don’t be an interrupter. •When the other person is finished, count to three before responding. •Use that time to think about what s/he has said.
Master Body Language to Understand Another's Mental Frame ~ Debbie Michaelson Quote: "I speak two languages, Body and English." ~Mae West Think: Knowing what others are really thinking and feeling is the first step towards influence. Observing facial expressions can reveal unspoken feelings and provide insight into others’ mental frame.. Do: In two conversations today make a specific effort to watch the other person's facial expression. Take note of their eyes, eyebrows, and lips.
Use Reflective Listening to Understand What Others are thinking~ Hugo Fernandes "The ear of the leader must ring with the voices of the people.“ ~ Woodrow Wilson THINK Exploit reflective listening to reveal and gain insight into the individual’s mental frame by listening with an open mind. DO I will train my mental state to verbally reconfirm a statement made that is important to the individual speaking.
Leaders should reframe the work environment to engage their employees to influence behavior ~ Beena Joy "There is no such thing as a worthless conversation, provided you know what to listen for. And questions are the breath of life for a conversation." — James Nathan Miller THINK Dialogue between management and employee is a key vital behavior in employee engagement. It affords a high return for very little cost DO In the next staff meeting, Encourage employees to suggest solutions to resolving staff conflicts. Recognize smart ideas
