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In the name of Allah. Scientific & Technical Presentation. Leila Sharif Sharif University of Technology E-Mail: [email protected] http://ce.sharif.edu/courses/84-85/1/ce221/. The Craft of Editing. Editing isn’t a cosmetic process. It’s a thinking process. Richard Rhodes, author

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In the name of allah

In the name of Allah


Scientific technical presentation

Scientific & Technical Presentation

Leila Sharif

Sharif University of Technology

E-Mail: [email protected]

http://ce.sharif.edu/courses/84-85/1/ce221/


In the name of allah

The Craft

of Editing

Editing isn’t a cosmetic process. It’s a thinking process.

Richard Rhodes, author

Making of the Atomic Bomb


In the name of allah

Although editing is a large subject, we will focus

on the editing that occurs in the sign-off process

Editing documents:

Reviewing

Line editing

Online editing

Proofreading

Reducing friction:

Actions by authors

Actions by editors


Before editing someone s document you should first consider your constraints

Before editing someone’s document,you should first consider your constraints

Audience

of Document

Format of

Document

Process to

Publish

Document

Formality of

Document

Other Editors

of Document

Politics and

Ethics


In the name of allah

Three aspects of the writing affect the way that editors assess documents

Content

Style

Form


In the name of allah

Is the content

appropriate?

Is the

content

correct?

Is the

content

complete?

Editing for content involves deciding

what message to send


In the name of allah

Focus on

language

Focus on

structure

Focus on

illustration

Editing for style involves deciding how to communicate the message


In the name of allah

Editing for form concerns whether the communication is properly presented

Focus on

punctuation

Focus on

grammar

Focus on

usage

Focus on

format

Focus on

spelling


In the name of allah

Difficulty

of

Change

Importance

of

Change

Consistency

of

Change

Disposition

of

Writer

What variables determine how much

change you make?


In the name of allah

consistency

hierarchy

clarity

effect

effect

effect

affect

most

important

deletee

e

next most

important

least

important

A well-done edit has three characteristics:

clarity, consistency, and hierarchy


One convention is to circle comments but not added words or letters

devised

for

sentence too long

This construction / #the

au*

*au: are you implying that Chem E contaminated

the soil?

One convention is to circle comments,but not added words or letters

Last year, city engineers came up with a plan to address the tetrachloroethane-contaminated soil required to be excavated for planned thoroughfare constructionthat will occur within

right-of-way adjacent to Building 1817, which houses the Genetics Laboratory.


In the name of allah

Editors

Identifying pet peeves

Negotiating gray areas

Establishing boundaries

Controlling tone

Understanding authors

Reducing the friction between editors and authors calls for action on both sides

Authors

Identifying constraints

Submitting outlines early

Allotting time for editors

Mulling over criticisms


In the name of allah

When editing someone’s writing, consider tone

Editor

Edit one another as

you would wish to

be edited

Lead with

the positive

Author


Structure of a scientific document

Structure

of a Scientific Document


In the name of allah

Structure:

the Strategy of Style

If a man can group his ideas, then he is a writer.Robert Louis Stevenson

Ending

Middle

Beginning


The organization of a scientific document can be viewed as a beginning middle and ending

The organization of a scientific document can be viewed as a beginning, middle, and ending

Conclusions

Back Matter

Ending

Middle Sections

Middle

Title

Summary

Introduction

Beginning


Beginnings prepare readers for understanding the work

orients readers to

document

Title

tells readers what

happens in document

Summary

prepares readers

for the middle

Introduction

Beginnings prepare readers for understanding the work


In the name of allah

Effects of Humidity

on the Growth

of Electron Avalanches

in Electrical Gas Discharges

A strong title orients readers to

your area of work

Effects of Humidity

on the Growth

of Avalanches


In the name of allah

Effects of Rhodamine-B

on the Electrodeposition

of Lead on Copper

A strong title also separates your

work from everyone else's work

Studies on the

Electrodeposition

of Lead on Copper


Several names for summaries exist

Several names for summaries exist

Summary

Technical

Abstract

Informative

Abstract

Abstract

Descriptive

Abstract

Executive

Summary


In the name of allah

This paper describes a new inertial navigation system that will increase the mapping accuracy of oil wells by a factor of ten. The new system uses three-axis navigation that protects sensors from high-spin rates. The system also processes its information by Kalman filtering (a statistical sampling technique) in an on-site computer. Test results show the three-dimensional location accuracy is within 0.1 meters for every 100 meters of well depth, an accuracy ten times greater than conventional systems.

Informative

Although several names exist for summaries,

there are essentially two approaches

This paper describes a new inertial navigation system for mapping oil and gas wells. In this paper, we will compare the mapping accuracy and speed for this new system against the accuracy and speed for conventional systems.

Descriptive


A document s introduction prepares readers for the discussion

A document's introduction prepares readers for the discussion

Topic?

Importance?

Background?

Arrangement?

Introduction


The introduction defines the scope and limitations of the work

Medical histories

not considered

Women may not

experience the

same effects

Other effects,

such as exercise,

not considered

The introduction defines the scopeand limitations of the work

scope

Proposed Study

on Effects of Alcohol

on Life Expectancy

Ten-year study

Three classes of drinkers:

non-drinkers

moderate drinkers

heavy drinkers

Men surveyed

limitations


In the name of allah

A strong introduction tells readers

why the research is important

This paper presents a design for a platinum catalytic igniter in hydrogen-air mixtures. This igniter has application in nuclear reactors. One danger at a nuclear reactor is a loss-of-coolant accident. Such an accident can produce large quantities of hydrogen gas when hot water and steam react with zirconium fuel rods. In a serious accident, the evolution of hydrogen may be so rapid that it produces an explosive hydrogen-air mixture in the reactor containment building. This mixture could breach the containment walls and allow radiation to escape.

Our method to eliminate this danger is to intentionally ignite the hydrogen-air mixture at concentrations below those for which any serious damage might result.

importance


In the name of allah

[Sandia, 1985]

In the middle of a report, you

present your work

Make sections

and subsections

Choose a logical

strategy

Heading

Subheading

Subheading

Heading

Subheading

Subheading

Subheading

Heading


In the name of allah

Chronological

[Maizels, 2001]

Spatial

[Pratt & Whitney, 2000]

Common strategies exist

for the middles of scientific reports


In the name of allah

Parallel

Parts

Flow

Corel Corporation

[Sandia, 1985]

Common strategies exist

for the middles of scientific reports


In the name of allah

Parallel

Descriptive

Introduction

Past Designs for Particle Beam Fusion

New Design for Particle Beam Fusion

Charging Marx Generators

Forming Line Pulse

Generating Particle Beam

Transporting Particle Beam

Irradiating Deuterium-Tritium Pellets

Results of New Design

Conclusions and Recommendations

Section headings should be descriptive and parallel

Non-Parallel

Non-Descriptive

Introduction

Background

Marx Generators

Line Pulse

Beam Generation

Transporting Beam

Pellets

Results

Conclusions


In the name of allah

When you divide a section into subsections, all the pieces should be of the same pie

New Design for Particle Beam Fusion

Charging Marx Generators

Generating Particle Beam

Irradiating Deuterium-Tritium Pellets

New Design for Particle Beam Fusion

Charging Marx Generators

Generating Particle Beam

Pellets


In the name of allah

Organization is hidden when headings occur in a long list without secondary headings

Performance of

the Solar One Receiver

Introduction

Receiver’s Efficiency

Steady State Efficiency

Average Efficiency

Receiver’s Operation Cycle

Start-Up Time

Operation Time

Operation During Cloud Transients

Receiver’s Mechanical Wear

Panel Mechanical Supports

Tube Leaks

Conclusion

Performance of

the Solar One Receiver

Introduction

Steady State Efficiency

Average Efficiency

Start-Up Time

Operation Time

Operation During Cloud Transients

Panel Mechanical Supports

Tube Leaks

Conclusion


Many journal articles follow a set organization named imrad

Materials and Methods

Discussion

Results

Many journal articles follow a set organization named IMRaD

Introduction


In a strong ending you analyze results and give a future perspective

In a strong ending, you analyze resultsand give a future perspective

Conclusions

Analyze results from overall perspective

Analysis of Results

Future Perspective

Several options:

Make recommendations

Discuss future work

Repeat limitations


Use appendices to supply background for secondary audiences

Use appendices to supply backgroundfor secondary audiences

Appendix A

Concern About the Greenhouse Effect

For almost a hundred years, experts have been concerned with the increasing concentrations of gases such as carbon dioxide, methane, and nitrogen oxides in the earth's lower atmosphere. These gases are natural by-products of combustion. Figure A-1 illustrates the correlation between global temperature and carbon dioxide concentrations...


Use appendices to supply secondary or tangential information to primary readers

Use appendices to supply secondary or tangential information to primary readers

Appendix B

Project Stormfury

In 1961, the United States Weather Bureau and the Department of Defense (Navy) began a project to reduce the strength of hurricanes. The project, called Project Stormfury, uses cloud seeding, a process used to produce rainfall and reduce hail in thunderstorms. In Project Stormfury, silver iodide crystals, similar in structure to ice, are dispersed by airplanes in the upper reaches of cloud formations just outside the hurricane's eye where the winds are highest. Initial results showed that wind speeds decreased between 15–30% after seedings...


In the name of allah

For secondary readers, use a glossary

to define unfamiliar terms

Glossary

burst point: the exact point in space where an atomic bomb is detonated.

clear visibility: a viewing range of twenty miles.

fallout: the descent to the Earth's surface of radioactive particles from a cloud contaminated with the fission products of a nuclear explosion.

hypocenter: the point on the earth's surface directly below the burst point; also called ground zero.


Failing to cite the contribution of others can be a fatal flaw in your career

[Luzzati, 1950]

Watson did not give enough credit to Franklin

Failing to cite the contribution of others can be a fatal flaw in your career

[Franklin, 1952]

James Watson surreptitiously looked at Rosalind Franklin’s work


Illustrations

Illustrations


Illustration the meshing of words with images

Illustration:The Meshing of Words With Images

Keep it as simple as possible, yet no simpler.

Albert Einstein

X-ray photograph of DNA [Rosalind Franklin, 1952]


Two types of illustrations exist tables and figures

Pressurizer

DateTimePower Level

4/251:00 am3200 MW

4/252:00 pm1600 MW

4/2511:10 pm1600 MW

4/261:00 am30 MW

4/261:19 am200 MW

4/261:23 am2,000,000 MW

Coolant

Loss

Reactor

Vessel

Steam

Generator

Core

Figure 1. Simplified diagram of nuclear reactor [Wolfson, 1991].

Two types of illustrations exist: tables and figures

Table 1. Reactor power levels in Chernobyl accident [Wolfson, 1991].


Tables can present words as well as numbers

Tables can present words as well as numbers

Table 2. Sequence of events in the Chernobyl accident [Wolfson, 1991].

DateTimePower LevelEvent

April 25

April 25

April 25

April 26

April 26

April 26

1:00 a.m.

2:00 p.m.

11:10 p.m.

1:00 a.m.

1:19 a.m.

1:23 a.m.

3200 MW

1600 MW

1600 MW

30 MW

200 MW

2,000,000 MW

Operators begin power descent

Power descent delayed for 9 hours

Emergency core-cooling system disconnected

Operators switch off automatic control

Power descent resumed

Power minimum reached

Operators pull rods beyond allowable limits

Operators start two additional coolant pumps

Operators violate coolant flow limits

Power surges by factor of 10,000 in 5 seconds


In the name of allah

Table 2. Blood glucose levels [Carlson, 1982].

Breakfast

300

250

200

150

100

50

0

Dinner

Lunch

Diabetic

Blood

Glucose

Level

(mg/dl)

Normal

(mg/dl*)

100.3

93.6

88.2

100.5

138.6

102.4

93.8

132.3

103.8

93.6

127.8

109.2

Diabetic

(mg/dl)

175.8

165.7

159.4

72.1

271.0

224.6

161.8

242.7

219.4

152.6

227.1

221.3

Time

(hour)

midnight

2:00

4:00

6:00

8:00

10:00

noon

2:00

4:00

6:00

8:00

10:00

Normal

12:006:00 am12:00 6:00 pm12:00

Hour

* decaliters/milligram

Figure 11. Blood glucose levels for normal individual and diabetic [Carlson, 1982].

When presenting numerical data, you

choose between tables and graphs


Line graphs are common in engineering and science

2000

1500

1000

500

0

Experiment

Simulation

0246810

Line graphs are common in engineering and science

Temperature

(K)

Distance From Burner (mm)

Figure 3. Computational and experimental temperatures for laminar diffusion flames [Sandia, 1987].


Bar graphs compare wholes

Bar graphs compare wholes

30

Normal range

20

7-10

Cells%

10

112–175

211–366

Flight Duration (Days)

Figure 4. Response of T-cells in cosmonauts after short-term and long-term flights [Konstantinova, 1991].


Gantt charts are a type of bar charts

Task197919811983198519871989

Construction

Test and Evaluation

Power Production

Figure 5. Schedule for the construction, evaluation, and production phases of the Solar One Power Plant.

Gantt charts are a type of bar charts


Pie graphs compare parts of a whole

Pie graphs compare parts of a whole

P

o

w

e

r

R

e

a

c

t

o

r

Medical and research wastes

(16%)

I

n

d

u

s

t

r

i

a

l

M

e

d

i

c

a

l

Industrial wastes

(28%)

G

o

v

e

r

n

m

e

n

t

Government wastes

(2%)

Power reactor wastes

(64%)

Figure 5. Volume of low-level nuclear wastes from various sources [League, 1985].


Graphs come in many forms

Natural

Sources

85 mrem

Medical

Sources

70 mrem

{

Average dose: 160 mrem

Fallout: < 3mrem

Occupational: < 1mrem

Nuclear power: < 1mrem

Figure 6. Estimated annual dose of radiation in the United States [GPU Nuclear, 1985].

Graphs come in many forms


In the name of allah

4

1

Combustor

3

2

Compressor

Turbine

When presenting images, you choose between photographs, drawings, and diagrams


In the name of allah

The main advantage of photographs is realism

60 seconds

59.5 seconds

59 seconds

Figure 2. Space Shuttle Challenger, from about 59 seconds to 60 seconds into launch (January 28, 1986). On the right rocket, flame first becomes visible and then impinges on tank.


In the name of allah

Combustor Simulator

Turbine Vanes

Secondary

Flow

Dilution Jet

Primary

Flow

Secondary

Flow

Film-Cooling

Holes

One advantage of drawings is control of detail

Figure 5. Wind tunnel experiment at Virginia Tech for evaluating film-cooling designs for the blades of gas turbine engines [Thole and others, 2000].


In the name of allah

The main advantage of a diagram is the ability to show flow of a variable through a system

Figure 8. Schematic of test stand for evaluating components of an air conditioner design.


Scientists and engineers often use illustrations that are too complex for the text

DSPH

RECEIVER

TSU

TSH

FLASH

TANK

FT

T

S

S

G

TURBINE

DEAR-

ATOR

HOT

WELL

HP

HTR

Figure 5. Schematic of thermalstorage system.

Scientists and engineers often use illustrationsthat are too complex for the text

The thermal storage system

stores heat in a huge, steel-

walled tank. Steam from

the solar receiver passes

through heat exchangers

to heat the thermal oil,

which is pumped into the

tank. The tank then

provides energy to run a

steam generator to

produce electricity. A

schematic of this system

is shown in Figure 5.


The precision of the illustrations should reflect the precision of the text

650°F

580°F

530°F

575°F

solar

receiver

Heat

Exchanger

Thermal

Tank

Heat

Exchanger

steam

generator

425°F

435°F

425°F

250°F

The precision of the illustrationsshould reflect the precision of the text

The thermal storage system, shown in Figure 6, stores

heat in a huge, steel-walled tank. Steam from the solar

receiver heats a thermal oil, which is pumped into the tank.

The tank then provides energy to run a steam generator to

produce electricity.

Figure 6. Schematic of thermal storage system for the solar power plant.


For clarity you should introduce and explain illustrations in the text

For clarity, you should introduce andexplain illustrations in the text

..., as shown in Figure 7.

Figure 7. Title of figure. Some formats allow you extra sentences to explain unusual details.


Inconsistencies between text and images disrupt fluidity

CONTROL

TERMINAL

PRINTER

CAMERA

COMPUTER

DIGITIZER

ELECTRO-

MECHANICAL

INTERFACE

ROCKET

Figure 8. Testing hardware.

Inconsistencies between text andimages disrupt fluidity

The testing hardware of the rocket shown in Figure 8 has five main components: camera, digitizer, computer, I/O interface, and mechanical interface. Commands are generated by the computer, then passed through the I/O interface to the mechanized interface where the keyboard of the ICU is operated. The display of the ICU is read with a television camera and then digitized. This information is then manipulated by the computer to direct the next command.


Illustration is the meshing of words with images

Electro-

Mechanical

Interface

2

1

Computer

Rocket

3

4

Camera

Digitizer

Illustration is the meshing of words with images

Our system for testing the launch controls of the rocket consists of four main parts: computer, electro-mechanical interface, camera, and digitizer. In this system (shown in Figure 9), the computer generates test commands to the rocket through the electro-mechanical interface. The test results are read with a television camera, and then digitized. The computer receives the information from the digitizer, and then directs the next test command.

Figure 9. System to test launch

controls for rocket.


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