Lectures of translation for seniors

1. Lectures of translation for seniors Literary Translation (II)

2. What is the style of literature? • The style includes • The characteristic manner of expression in prose or verse; • how a particular writer says things. • The analysis and assessment of style involves • examination of a writer’s choice of words, • his figures of speech, the devices (rhetorical and otherwise), • the shape of his sentences (whether they be loose or periodic), • the shape of paragraphs, etc.

3. Considerations for stylistic equivalence • 1) the diction • formal/neutral/informal • Slang and speech errors • 2) sentence patterns • The passive voice --Parallelism • complexity • 3) figures of speech • semantic rhetorical devices: simile/metaphor/hyperbole/pun,etc • Phonological rhetorical devices: alliteration/rhyme/onomatopoeia, etc

4. Diction (I) • “big words” vs. “small words” • -- “I doubt if you ever will see him now.) It’s plain to me, he’s off.” • -- “Do you mean that he has deserted his daughter?” • -- “Ay! I mean,” said Mr. Childers, with a nod, “that he has cut. He was goosed last night, he was goosed the night before last, he was goosed today.” • “……在我看来事情已经很清楚，他已经溜了。” • “你是说他已经把女儿抛弃了吗？” • “唉！”齐尔德斯先生点一点头，“我是说，他已经一溜烟跑了。他昨天晚上挨‘嘘’，前天晚上挨‘嘘’，今儿又挨‘嘘’，还能呆得下去吗？”

5. Diction (II) • Slang and speech errors • Some kind person has sent me Chawcer’s poems. Mr. C had talent, but he couldn’t spel. No man has a right to be a lit’rary mann onless he knows he to spel. It is a pity that Chawcer, who had geneyus, was so unedicated. He’s the wus speller I knew of. • 有个好心人送给我乔瘦的诗。乔先生挺有才气，可是不会乒写。谁不会乒写，旧不配当文人。乔瘦挺有天材，可所受的叫育却如此差，真叫遗憾。他是我见过的乒写最遭糕的人。

6. Diction (III) • circumlocution • 孔乙己便涨红了脸，额头的青筋条条绽出，争辩道，“窃书不能算偷……窃书！……读书人的事，能算偷吗？” • At that Kong Yiji would flush, the veins on his forehead standing out as he protested, “Taking books can’t be counted as stealing…taking books…for a scholar…can’t be counted as stealing.”

7. Diction (V) • Cultural factors • 沧海月明珠有泪，蓝田日暖玉生烟 • In moonlit pearls see tears in mermaid’s eyes; • From sunburnt emerald see vapor rise. • Tr. by Xu Yuanchong

8. Diction (VI) • Style of language for different age groups and regional dialects • 我们便都挤在船头看打仗，但那铁头老生却又并不翻筋斗，只有几个赤膊的人翻，翻了一阵，都进去了，接着走出一个小旦来，咿咿呀呀的唱。（鲁迅《社戏》 • We all crowded to the bow to watch the fighting, but the acrobat did not turn any somersaults. Only a few of the bare-armed men turned over heels a few times, then trooped off. Then a girl came out and sang in a shrill falsetto. --tr. by Yang Xianyi and Gladys Yang

9. Sentence patterns (III) • Repetition in Chinese and English • 如果我能够，我要写下我的悔恨和悲哀，为子君，为自己。 • 会馆里的被遗忘在偏僻里的破屋是这样的寂静和空虚。时光过得真快，我爱子君，仗着她逃出这寂静和空虚已经满一年了。事情又这么不凑巧，我重来时，偏偏空着的又只有这一间屋；依然是这样的破窗，这样的窗外的半枯的槐树和老紫藤，这样的窗前的方桌，这样的败壁，这样的靠壁的板床。深夜中独自躺在床上，就如我未曾和子君同居以前一般，过去一年中的时光全被消灭，从未有过，我并没有曾经从这破屋子搬出，在吉兆胡同创立了满怀希望的小小的家。（鲁迅《伤逝——涓生的手记》）

10. I want, if I can, to record my remorse and grief, for Zijun’s sake as well as for my own. • How silent and empty it is, this shabby room in the forgotten corner of the hostel. Time certainly flies. A whole year has passed since I fell in love with Zijun and, thanks to her, escaped from this silence and emptiness. On my return here, as ill luck would have it, this was the half-withered locust tree and old wistaria outside it and the square table in front of it are unchanged. Unchangedtoo are the mouldering wall and wooden bed beside it. At night I lie alone, just as I did before living with Zijun. The past year has been blotted out as if it had never been, as if I had never moved out of this shabby room to set up house, in a small way but with high hopes, in Lucky Lane. • --tr. by Yang Xianyi and Gladys Yang

11. Parallelism in English and Chinese • 北国的秋，却特别地来得清，来得静，来得悲凉。（郁达夫《故都的秋》） • In North China, however, it is particularly limpid, serene and melancholy. • 江南，秋当然也是有的，但草木凋得慢，空气来得润，天的颜色显得淡，而且有时常多雨而少风，……只能感到一点点清凉，秋的味，秋的色，秋的意境和姿态，总看不饱，尝不透，玩味不到十足。 • There is of course autumn in the South too, but over there plants wither slowly, the air is moist, the sky pallid, and it is more often rainy than windy. While muddling along all by myself …, I feel nothing but a little chill in the air, without ever relishing to my heart’s content the flavor, color, mood and style of the season. • Tr. by Zhang Peiji

12. Comparison of Chinese and Western poetry • 总观全体，西诗以直率胜，中诗以委婉胜；西诗以深刻胜，中诗以微妙胜；西诗以铺陈胜，中诗以简隽胜。 • －－朱光潜《中西诗在情趣上的比较》

13. Different approaches to poetry translation • 中诗英译可以大致划分为三派，一是格律派（以Hebert Giles为代表），二是自由诗派（以Arthur Waley为代表），三是散文化派（以翁显良为代表）。 • Andre Lefevere • （1）语音翻译；（2）直译；（3）音步翻译；（4）散文翻译；（5）音韵翻译；（6）白体诗翻译；（7）阐释翻译。他本人最为推崇最后一种方法。 • 格律派和音韵翻译最能够忠实体现原诗的丰姿，即许渊冲先生所提倡的“以诗译诗”，因此这种翻译方式是国内诗歌翻译的主流。

14. Translatability of poetry • 以格律诗体翻译诗歌，困难重重，译者不仅要准确地传达意义，而且还要把握住作者意图、意境、音韵、结构等多种因素，势必“带着脚镣跳舞”，腾挪躲闪的余地非常小。 • Poetry is what gets lost in translation. • Robert Frost • Example: • 天净沙·秋思 • 马致远 • 枯藤老树昏鸦，小桥流水人家，古道西风瘦马，夕阳西下，断肠人在天涯。

15. Various translations • (1) Withered vines, old trees, evening crows; • Tiny bridge, flowing brook, hamlet homes; • Ancient road, wind from west, bony horse; • The sun is setting, • Broken man, far from home, roams and roams. • Tr. by Cytril Birch. • (2) Crows hovering over rugged old trees wreathed with rotten vine – the day is about done. Yonder is a tiny bridge over a sparkling stream, and on the far bank, a pretty little village. But the traveler has to go on down this ancient road, the west wind moaning, his bony horse groaning, trudging towards the sinking sun, farther and farther away from home. (tr. by Weng Xianliang)

16. (3) At dusk o’er old trees wreathed with withered vine fly crows, • ‘Neath tiny bridge beside a cot a clear stream flows, • On ancient road in western breeze a lean horse goes, • Westward declines the sun, • Far, far from home is the heart-broken one. • (4) Withered vines hanging on old branches, • Returning crows croaking at dusk • A few houses hidden past a narrow bridge, • And below the bridge quiet creek running, Down a worn path, in the west wind, • A lean horse comes plodding. • The sun dips down in the west, • And the lovesick traveler is still at the end of the world. • (tr. by Ding Zuxin)

17. Translation of style in poetry • The fair breeze blew, the white foam flew, • The furrow followed free; • We were the first that ever burst • Into that silent sea. • --from The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Coleridge • 那好风吹，那白浪花飞， • 那航迹随后无阻； • 我们是古来第一次突破 • 进入那寂静的海。 好风不断吹，浪花不绝飞， 舟行到处留痕； 俺们是古来第一遭冲开， 那片岑寂的穷溟。

18. 人曾为僧，人弗可以为佛。 • 女卑是婢，女又何妨成奴。 • A Buddhist cannot bud into a Buddha. • A maiden may be made a house maid. • 寻寻觅觅，冷冷清清，凄凄惨惨凄凄。（李清照） • So dim, so dark,/ so dense, so dull,/ so damp, so dank, so dead. (tr. by Lin Yutang) • I look for what I miss,/ I know not what it is,/ I feel so sad, so drear, / So lonely, without cheer. • I seek but seek in vain, / I search and search again, / I feel so sad, so drear, / So lonely, without cheer. (tr. by Xu Yuanchong)