Five Faces of Death

1. Five Faces of Death Based on “Love is Stronger than Death” (Kreeft)

2. Three Key Questions • What is death? • “The mystery of death” (Pope John Paul II) • What does it mean to die? • When does death begin? • Why do we die? • In what way is death the “end” of life? • What is the meaning of life? • Death concentrates the mind • Death puts life into question • Don Quixote: Not “Why was I dying?” but “Why am I living?”

3. Kübler-Ross • The stages of grief • Denial: “This can’t be happening” • Anger: “Why me? It’s not fair” • Bargaining: “I’ll do anything to live a few more years” • Depression: “I’m going to die soon; what’s the point” • Acceptance: “I might as well prepare” • Explains what people go through

4. Five Faces of Death • “Death wears five face” • Not the five stages of grief • Not necessarily seen in order • Explains the way death presents itself • Enemy: Something we fear • Stranger: Something we ignore • Friend: Something we can deal with • Mother: Something that gives birth to life • Lover: Something we willingly embrace

5. Five Faces • The first three faces are accepted by all, regardless of religion or world view • The last two are consciously denied, but subconsciously hoped for • The last two faces require a hope of life after death • Goal: To see all the faces of death, and ultimately to see death as a Lover • Embraced, welcomed • Seen as one who makes life better

6. Enemy • We must first see death as an enemy • Death never be our friend; it can only become our friend • Death can only become our friend after we have seen it as our enemy • Death is not part of a natural cycle • It is an attack on our nature • To a seven year old: “Your cousin has gone back to the earth; part of the ‘circle of life.’” • Seven year old: “I don’t want my cousin to be fertilizer!”

7. Enemy • Death steals • Loss of life • Life is good, not evil; so a good is stolen • Death is not sleep • We live through sleep • Death is not relaxing; rigor mortis sets in • Think: Why did • Jesus say, “She is not dead but sleeping.” • Paul say, “Those who die sleep in the Lord.”

8. Enemy • Death appears ugly, light-less and lifeless • We must dress up • “Dead bodies belong in the grave” • They must be buried • Death is inevitable • People say, “When it gets older, will the baby perhaps be a doctor?” • No one says, “Will the baby perhaps die? • Death is irreversible • The worst enemies create a bad situation that cannot be changed

9. Enemy • Death creates despair, weeping, mourning • It causes us • Not to laugh but to cry • Not to look forward, but to regret • Not to anticipate, but to fear • Not to rejoice but to regret • Death leads to guilt • Puzzle: Death is both natural and unnatural • Is there hope?

10. Stranger • Hate versus Indifference • If we hate, then we have loved • Indifference drives out love • Indifference is being dead • Dead to others • Dead to God • Dead to self • Dead to death

11. Stranger • Why do we choose to ignore death? Why do we flinch when we see death? • Unknown • Painful • Forces us to view our own mortality • Modern indifference • Seen in • Wakes • Drive up funerals • Cremation • Helps us ignore the life in the body

12. Stranger • Six reasons we turn death into a stranger • Collectivism: “We are all one in death” • Why is this a lie?: Every man dies for himself alone; every death is individual • Skepticism: “No one can known the meaning of death” • Why is this a lie?: Every culture has explained the meaning of death through its rituals; even our skepticism explains the meaning of death.

13. Friend • Middle Step in our journey into death • This face is true, real and must be confronted whether or not holds to life after death. • Death is our friend for seven reasons • It is our Being • It is our Openness • It is our Life’s Frame • It is our Appreciation of Life • It is our Food • It is our Truth • It is our Opportunity for Heroism

14. Friend: Being • What is a friend? • “A friend is another self” • I look at friend not as an object in the world (stranger); rather I look at a friend through his eyes at the world and myself • A friend helps us see who we really are • A friend helps us see ourselves to help us • Not a sparring partner, not an enemy • To face death is to face who we are • Death is at the heart of our very self, our very being

15. Friend: Being • Death is our “other self,” our alter ego • Death is not a generic enemy, but the enemy within • It helps us see who we really are • It helps us see what matters most to us • Our very being is “being-toward-death” • Therefore, death is ourselves, who we are • It is both our present and our future • Not the last point on the line, but the movement and direction of the whole line • Latin Hymn: “In the midst of life, we are in death” • It is our “black hole” sucking life out of us • Oddity: Death is nonbeing, nonliving

16. Friend: Openness • What is a friend? • A friend is honest with us • A friend helps us live in the present • Not merely in the past • A friend helps open us up to new ideas, new possibilities, new thoughts, new experiences • Love and knowledge with trust are most important among friends who open us up • Death helps us love life • Death helps us know and be honest with our life • Death helps us trust what is best

17. Friend: Frame • What is a friend? • A frame which complete us • A frame which helps to define us • A frame which helps center the center • Death is a frame because • It centers us • It defines us by forcing us to ask who we truly are, and what we truly want to be • It gives us wholeness, completeness

18. Friend: Appreciation • What is a friend? • A friend helps us appreciate what we have • A friend helps us appreciate who we are • A friends helps us appreciate what we can be • Death is a friend who helps us appreciate • Matters of life and death • Each day as if it were our last (“no regrets”) • What we value about ourselves, about others

19. Friend: Food

20. Friend: Truth

21. Friend: Heroism • What is a friend? • Someone we look up to (role model) • Someone we will rescue (die for) • Someone we will live for

22. Mother • A mother • loves her child • love begins the child • love grows as the child grows • Disciplines her child • Nurtures her child • Lets her child go • Gives child independence to live on his own • Gives her child life

23. Mother • Death is like a mother because death • Gives new life (rebirth) • the sack giving way to light in The Death of Ivan Illych • Disciplines by giving awareness of our mortality • can influence the way we live • helps us see life in a new way • reorganizes the priorities of our life • Nurtures us by showing us what lies ahead • Gives us a way to get to new life

24. Mother • We are now in the womb, but we need to be born by going through the birth canal. Death is the birth canal—it is traumatic. • Death gives birth to life. • Everyone goes from death to life; everyone will rise from the dead • Only question – where we go after rising from dead • Death is not a separation, but a change in relationship

25. Mother • Conclusions • Death isn't a curse but a blessing  • Death leads us from one community to another giving us more freedom • Death brings you to your final end • Death brings you to a new love  • Death is a repeat of being born • Death helps us rehearse for our new life

26. Lover • Sees death as an exhilarating fascinating “person” to whom one wholly yields himself knowing that, by sacrificing, he becomes more of what he is. • By embracing death as a lover, we become • More aware of life • More ready to embrace the fullness of life • The most mature view • The view of the saints and faithful

27. Lover • Like love, death is individual • Every person loves another by himself alone • Each love (with lover and beloved) is unique • Death leads us to our greatest love • Allows us to meet our True Love • Our “golden chariot” which Love sends to bring us to Himself • “I’m so happy, I could die” • What does this mean? • Joy exceeds death (p. 106)

28. Lover • Love conquers all—even death • Love is strong as death, stronger than death • Love bridges the gap, the curse, the absence by • Giving us hope to see others • Giving us hope to live • Giving us the hope of the summumbonum

29. Lover • Love Himself uses death • Converts & transforms death • So that we might overcome the devilish lie • There is no hope, no God, no heaven, no point • So that we can see death for what it truly is • So that we have true freedom • To choose God without fear • Of losing Him • Of being lost

30. Essay • Explain how Ivan Ilyich confronts or faces two of the five “face of death” presented by Kreeft. Use gobs of details to support your argument. Each description should consist of one paragraph (7-10 sentences). • Using a pre-approved movie or book, explain how one of the key characters confronts or faces two of the five “face of death” presented by Kreeft. Use gobs of details to support your argument. Each description should consist of one paragraph (7-10 sentences).