Chapter 9

1. Chapter 9 Sexual Expression

2. Sexual Expression • A complex process through which we reveal our sexual selves • Involves behaviors and feelings • Research relies upon self reports which may be problematic • “The research data provide only a general idea if what behaviors actually occur and do not indicate “how” people should express their sexuality...or what “normal” is. Sexuality is one of the most individualistic aspects of life; each of us has our own sexual values, needs, and preferences.”

3. Sexual Attractiveness • Characteristics of what is “attractive” vary across cultures, but two universals emerge • Youthfulness • Health • Theories proposed by evolutionary psychologists can be difficult to test • Theories – Youth of the mother is an important reproductive strategy (greater likelihood of healthy offspring) –and- good health is required for reproductive potential and delivering/maintaining newborn

4. Sexual Attractiveness • Thus, • These theories suggest why men may “biologically” be attracted to younger women and why women may be attracted to “older – stable” men for maturity and resources. • Studies have demonstrated that economic security and employment are much more important to women than men. • These preference differences are reflected in internet dating sites, personal ads, etc.

5. A Cross-Cultural Analysis • Various cultures emphasize: • The eyes • Height and weight • Size and shape of genitals • American ideals of beauty not universal • Breasts not erotic in several cultures • Plump women preferred over thin women in majority of cultures (Americans are in the minority for this preference)

6. Sexual Strategies Theory: Buss / Geary This theory addresses the gender differences in short and long-term heterosexual relationships from an evolutionary mating perspective. Theory suggests that males and females face different adaptive problems in “casual” or short-term mating and long-term reproductive mating, leading to different strategies or behaviors for solving problems.

7. Sexual Strategies Theory: Buss / Geary • Males and females differ in preferred traits in partners • In general, women will select on resources that the man can offer, short and long term. Women tend to be the most selective in choosing a mate. • Males and females have different strategies of commitment • In general, women are predicted to avoid short-term relationships id the cost outweigh the possible benefits, this is not true, in general in men. Men are more likely to pursue short term causal, sexual, relationships.

8. Sexual Strategies Theory: Buss / Gary • Differences exist due to differences in reproductive investment and reproductive physiology • Men are more likely to use the “short-term” strategy because of the desire for sexual variety and the desire for multiple sexual partners • Multiple partners may be an “innate” method of “insuring” reproduction – Men also require less time to elapse than women before consenting to intercourse (with another person). HLED 403 Human Sexuality

9. Sexual Strategies Theory: Buss / Gary Fenigstein and Preston research study (2007) examined the gender differences in an imagined desired number of sexual partners during the next year where sex would be “free” from STI’s and pregnancy or dangerous and relatively unavailable. When considering the less negative sexual concerns, the majority of women desired one sexual partner, whereas men desired multiple sexual partners. The researchers concluded that these findings could be explained by the Sexual Strategies Theory (Table 9.1, next slide), and the Social Role Theory Social Role Theory – Men are socialized towards the pleasurable components of sexual interaction, and women are more concerned with the relational components of sex

10. Cost vs. Benefits (short and long-term sexual relationships):Gary

11. Think About ItIn Class Activity In-class review of “Hooking Up” Among College Students., p 264, text. Questions for review. If you know of people (do not mention names) who have hooked-up have they been positive or negative? How so? Is casual sex more socially acceptable for males or females? Why? Kathleen Bogle’s research noted that casual sex gives both men and women more sexual options, but promoted men’s interest in “playing the field” but not women’s interest in an “evolving relationship”. Thus, there are no “rules” for “hooking-up” in women. So, how does this limit women's options in seeking sexual relationships?

12. What is important to us? ( Rank ordering of Mate Characteristics by College Undergraduates Across Six Decades )Significant shifts in “good looks” may be due to the influence media, and there was a convergence of top ranked attributes.

13. Sexual Desire • Can exist separately from physical sexual expression • Very little scientific research in this area because desire is difficult to define and quantify • Desire is influenced by two factors: • Erotophilia: a positive emotional response toward sexuality-related situations • Erotophobia: a negative emotional response toward sexuality-related situation

14. Sexual Desire • Erotophilic:more likely to accept and enjoy their sexuality, experience less sex guilt, seek out sexual situations, engage in more auto erotic and interpersonal sexual activities, enjoy talking about sex – in contrast to the Erotophobic • A persons emotional response to sex is also linked to how they evaluates other aspects of sex • An erotophilic person is more likely to have a positive view erotic materials and paraphernalia • Erotophobic and Erotophilic behaviors are not fixed. They can be modified over time with behavioral conditioning.

15. Sexual Scripts – “sexual behaviors and feelings depend more on learning than on biological drive” • Scripts organize our sexual expressions • “A script is simpler than the activity that we perform…It is a blueprint or roadmap or recipe, giving directions but not giving directions…it is modified by our concrete acts, but not replaced by them…few people have the desire, energy or persistence to create highly innovative or novel scripts” – John Gagnon (1977). • Our sexual scripts have 3 main components: • Cultural • Intrapersonal • Interpersonal

16. "Do it this way" "don't do that!" Cultural Scripting • Provides the general pattern of expected sexual behaviors • Our culture tells us which behaviors are acceptable (moral or normal) and which are unacceptable (immoral or abnormal) • Individual views may not match cultural views of erotica • We may believe that everyone shares our own particular script, and then we may project our own experiences onto others expecting them to share our own definitions. But often, they initially do not. • If our scripts are to be integrated, we must communicate using words gestures and movements.

17. Intra and Interpersonal Scripting • Intrapersonal: Focus on the internal and physiological states that are associated with sexual arousal (increased heart rate, erection, etc.) • Intrapersonal scripts provide a sequence of body movements that activate biological events and release tension(ex. Learning body “feelings” and sequence of events in successfully masturbating.) • Question for discussion – how might an erotophilic and erotophobic person express and experience intrapersonal scripting differently?

18. Intra and Interpersonal Scripting • Interpersonal: Involves the shared conventions and signals that enable two people to engage in sexual behaviors ( body language, words, touching) • The movements we use in arousing ourselves or others are our erotic activators • Inexperienced (typically young individuals) sexual individuals are often unfamiliar with sexual scripts. They may limit their scripting to holding hands, kissing, etc. As the range of scripting expands, the more experienced individual may lose some of the sexual intensity for the earlier scripting activities.

19. Cultural Scripting – The Details • Sets the general contours or outlines our script • Order or sequence of sexual events • What types of sexual activity or practice are “acceptable” and which forms are discouraged. • These “generally accepted” scripts do not “fit” the individual pattern or desire of the individual • We tend to believe that “most people” share our individual script so we project our script on others, and this behavior can diminish or suppress the sexual behavior of our partner. • Thus, the different scripts should be communicated and integrated.

20. Intrapersonal Scripting – The Details • Gives meaning to physiological responses • Determines what physiological events we “recognize” as sexual or erotic • These “sexual” or erotic feelings become associated with sexual activity • We then learn body functions and movements necessary to carry out sexual activity to its completion (orgasm / ejaculation). • Masturbatory activities would be an example of how we would integrate sexual feelings into scripting of activities to act upon the feelings.

21. Interpersonal Scripting – The Details • Shared conventions that make sexual activity possible • body language, “teasing”, proximity etc., the movements we use in arousing ourselves or others are erotic activators • sexual scripts expand as one ages. A kiss for a young teenager may be as exciting as foreplay for an older individual. • Cultural expectations may interfere with desired interpersonal scripting. ( ex. More college-aged men would like to have women share the initiation of sexual activity, or would enjoy being the desired sex object)

22. Autoeroticism • Sexual activities that do not involve a partner • One of the earliest expressions of sexual activity • Sexual fantasies and dreams • Masturbation • Most common autoerotic materials for men: adult videos, nude / topless clubs • Most common for women: adult videos, clubs, and viewing explicit books or magazines

23. Functions of Fantasies • Define and direct erotic goals • Fantasies may be unrealistic or unattainable • Anticipate and prepare for erotic situations • Provide an opportunity for rehearsal • Provide pleasurable escape • Safe way to introduce novelty into the relationship • Clues to the unconscious mind – may serve same function as dreams

24. Functions of Fantasies • Noted psychologist Dr. Michael Bader discusses the unconscious meanings of sexual fantasies. (Video) • Website: http://www.michaelbader.com/home.html • Your thoughts: Is sex really all in the mind?

25. Gender and Sexual Fantasies • Leitenberg and Henning (1995) • Notable differences in sexual fantasies of men and women consistent across orientation • Men’s tended to be more active, focusing on fantasy partner’s body, multiple partners, explicit sexual acts, physical gratification, and domination • Women’s tended to be more passive, focusing on partner’s interest in own body, emotional content, romance, and submission

26. Erotic Dreams • Dreams can accompany nocturnal orgasm for men and women • Dream content may not be overtly sexual • Content of dreams cannot be controlled and often runs the gamut of sexual possibilities

27. Masturbation Most men and women masturbate for several reasons Relaxation Relief of sexual tension Partner not available Physical pleasure Aid to falling asleep A way to avoid STIs and HIV

28. Masturbation Attitudes towards masturbation vary along ethnic, cultural, and religious lines Latino and Black cultures are generally less accepting than White culture Prevalence of masturbation is correlated with education, ethnicity, and religion More education = ↑ masturbation Caucasian = ↑ masturbation Some religions discourage masturbation

29. Masturbation Data

30. Masturbation and Sexualtity An important means of learning about our bodies Not necessarily a substitute for interpersonal sexual activity A legitimate form of activity in its own right – may be used as a means of overcoming specific sexual problems and discovering sexual potential.

31. Masturbation Across the Lifespan Children and adolescents masturbate and a neutral or non-judgmental parental reaction can be important Women and masturbation Women who masturbate appear to hold more positive sexual attitudes and are more likely to be orgasmic Most common is clitoral stimulation

32. Masturbation Across the Lifespan Men and masturbation Typically requires manual stimulation of the penile shaft. Masturbation and marriage Can provide sexual pleasure when a partner cannot

33. Sexual Behavior with Others Touching pleasuring tribidism interfemoral intercourse Kissing Oral-genital sex cunnilingus fellatio Vaginal intercourse Anal eroticism analingus anal intercourse

34. Touching A sign of caring and signal for arousal The entire body is responsive to touch and caresses Genital touch is one of many forms of this type of pleasuring Pleasuring (Masters and Johnson) – non-genital touching Promotes exploring and how our bodies respond to touching.

35. Kissing Usually our earliest interpersonal sexual experience First kiss is often a milestone The most widely accepted of all premarital sexual activities Lips are highly sensitive to touch and highly erotic

36. Oral-Genital Sex Became part of more Americans’ sexual scripts in the 20th century Cunnilingus: the erotic stimulation of a woman’s vulva and/or clitoris by her partner’s mouth and tongue Fellatio: the oral stimulation of a man’s penis by his partner’s sucking and licking

37. Oral-Genital Sex Incidence: 70-90% report engaging in oral sex over the course of their lifetime Attitude towards genitals and sex can affect their comfort with oral sex Reduce risk of STI and HIV with latex barriers Ejaculation and semen Preference Risk

38. Sexual Intercourse A source of pleasure, communication, and love Positions Tantric – slow building process of sexual activity

39. Anal Eroticism Analingus: Oral–anal contact Anal - manual activities Anal intercourse: insertion of a penis into anus Individuals of all sexual orientations engage in anal eroticism

40. End of Presentation