Team Decisionmaking and Domestic Violence

1. Team Decisionmaking and Domestic Violence An Advanced Training for TDM Facilitators and Child Protection Supervisors Slide # 1

2. Agenda • Introductions • Domestic Violence, Child Maltreatment, and Family to Family Team Decisionmaking • Foundations of a Good DV TDM Meeting • Engagement and Assessment • Developing Ideas and Reaching a Consensus Decision • Planning Next Steps Slide # 2

3. True or False • The TDM maxim of “Nothing about us without us” means that the entire family should be invited to the TDM meeting, regardless of the concerns. • It is not appropriate for the TDM facilitator and worker to meet privately with a family member in advance of the TDM meeting. • When domestic violence becomes known to the child protection staff for the first time in the TDM meeting where both parents are present, the TDM facilitator should list domestic violence as a concern and ask for more information from the family or worker. Slide # 3

4. Domestic Violence Domestic violence is a pattern of behavior in which one person attempts to control an intimate partner through threats or actual use of physical violence, sexual assault, verbal and psychological abuse and/or economic coercion. Slide # 4

5. Overlap of Child Abuse & DV • Most studies found 30% to 60% overlap, 41% was median • High rates of overlap found in: • Child fatality reviews (41% - 43%) • Abused child studies • Battered mother studies Edleson (1999), Appel & Holden (1998) Slide # 5

6. How are children exposed to DV? • Directly witness assault, rape • Hear the violence, name calling, intimidation, threats, disrespect • Feel the tension • See the aftermath—broken furniture, bruises on their mother, father being taken away by police • Forced to participate in or watch the abuse of their mother • Intervene to protect their mother Slide # 6

7. How are children exposed to DV? • May have their own safety or well-being threatened—threats to kill, threats to call CPS (removal), threats of kidnapping, never seeing their mother again • Physically placed in harm’s way • After separation, may be used to relay messages, keep tabs on mother, harass mother • Seriously injured or killed during an assault • Witness homicide of mother Slide # 7

8. Problems Related to Exposure • Over 100 studies available • A third separated abused from exposed children and found similar outcomes • Generally show: • Behavioral and emotional problems • Cognitive functioning problems • Longer-term problems Edleson (1999) Slide # 8

9. Impact of Exposure In infants and young children, exposure may • Interfere with developmental tasks (physical, cognitive, emotional, and social) • Cause trauma responses/alter brain chemistry • Weaken coping skills Slide # 9

10. Impact of Exposure In infants and young children may show up as • Low birth weight • Exaggerated startle response • Somatic complaints • Regression in toileting or language • Sleep disturbances • Difficulty attaching to caregiver • Hyper-vigilance • Separation anxiety • Eating disorders Slide # 10

11. Aggression Delinquency Anti-social behavior Hyperactivity Conduct disorders Academic problems Attitudes supporting the use of violence Substance abuse Depression Anxiety Low self-esteem Social withdrawal Somatic complaints Trauma (some PTSD) Impact of Exposure In school-aged and older children, exposure can result in: Slide # 11

12. Impact of Exposure Exposure to DV may have emotional and physical consequences for children depending on: • Frequency, severity, chronicity, proximity to the violence • Age and developmental stage at which exposure begins • Multiple forms of violence (child abuse, community violence, exposure to DV) Slide # 12

13. Impact of Exposure Exposure to DV may have emotional and physical consequences for children depending on: • Presence or absence of loving and supportive adults • Presence or absence of supportive community • Child’s individual temperament • Opportunities for healing and success Slide # 13

14. Resiliency in Children Exposed • Children’s resilience to trauma is linked to the presence of a healthy parent or adult in their lives.(Margolin, 1998) • Children’s emotional recovery from exposure to DV depends more on the quality of their relationship with the non-battering parent than any other single factor.(Bancroft & Silverman, 2002) Slide # 14

15. Resiliency in Children Exposed • 70% of abusive parents were abused as children themselves BUT • 70% of abused children do not become abusive parents (Center for the Study of Social Policy, 2005) Slide # 15

16. Forms of Intimate Partner Violence • Battering • Reactive/Resistive violence • Situational violence • Pathological violence • Anti-social violence (Praxis International, 2006) Slide # 16

17. Safety Ground Rule We create a place of physical and emotional safety for all who participate in the TDM. Slide # 17

18. Facilitator Explanation “This meeting needs to be a place of physical and emotional safety for all who participate, and we want that safety to continue after we complete the meeting. Examples of how we ensure safety are: • We respect restraining orders and other court orders prohibiting contact between people. • We give permission for each person to keep themselves safe during the meeting (for instance, if a family member needs to take a break at any time, they can do so). Slide # 18

19. FacilitatorExplanation • I might, as the facilitator, suggest a time-out, that we take a break, or that we move into separate meetings if I believe that someone is feeling unsafe; and • We adhere to ‘Nothing about us without us’ except when there is a safety concern for a participant.” Slide # 19

20. Minimum DV TDM Safety Standards • Do not violate court orders • Do not increase danger to the child • Therefore do not increase danger to the mother, which can lead to increased danger for the child • Do not share disclosures of mother or child with the perpetrator Slide # 20

21. Minimum DV TDM Safety Standards • Worker holds pre-meeting planning conversation with non-offending parent • Conduct safety check-in just before the TDM meeting • Hold separate meetings for non-offending parent and perpetrator, or make alternative arrangements for his participation Slide # 21

22. Minimum DV TDM Safety Standards • Establish safety for mothers and kids together whenever possible • Facilitator interrupts any discussion of DV not known to the facilitator in advance of the TDM meeting • Postpone the meeting if necessary for safety Slide # 22

23. Better DV TDM Safety Standards (In addition to Minimum Standards) • Avoid increasing risk (potential for future harm) to the child and battered mother • Hold perpetrator of violence accountable, with regular check-ins with mother to determine impact on safety Slide # 23

24. Challenges to CPS Assessment • Confirmation bias: the tendency to conform the world to our perceptions of it, rather than seeing things as they actually are • One-sidedness: an over-emphasis on what is wrong or scary Slide # 24

25. Challenges to CPS Assessment • False “neutrality “ of assessment. How and when we ask questions; what we DON’T ask; and where we focus our energy all have an impact on families • Lack of awareness of how dominant culture values shape our view of families Slide # 25

26. Improving CPS Assessments • Nurture an agency culture of self-reflection that learns from successes, failures, and “near misses” • Collaborate with providers • Partner with families • Rigorously search for both safety and danger Slide # 26

27. Improving CPS Assessments • Enhance critical thinking • Notice habitual assumptions • Be clear about what information is needed • Be self-reflective re: race and culture • Search for exceptions to abuse/neglect • Authorize “designated doubters” Slide # 27

28. Assumption: He’s just under a lot of stress; he has anger management problems; he just “lost it”. Alternative explanation: If this was about stress, he’d be abusive with everyone, not just his family. Does he hit his boss when he’s angry at work? The cashier who gives him incorrect change? His probation officer who is disrespectful to him? DV Assessments Slide # 28

29. Assumption: She always goes back. She always lets him back into the house. Alternative explanation: She loves and wants to be with him. It’s his abuse she wants to stop. She can’t make it on her own financially. She is new to this country or community, and she feels lonely and isolated. He is her connection to her previous life. She is in more danger when they are separated. He has threatened to hurt the children if she doesn’t go home. DV Assessments Slide # 29

30. Assumption: She chooses men who abuse her. Alternative explanation: She chooses men for love. They choose to abuse her. Abusive men prey on vulnerable women. She has not had positive role models for relationships. DV Assessments Slide # 30

31. Assumption She chooses her partner over her children. Alternative explanation She protects the children by attending to his needs. She wants her children to have their father in their lives. In her culture, family is everything. He promises her that he will change; he seems remorseful. Her family arranged the marriage. Leaving would disgrace her family. DV Assessments Slide # 31

32. DV Assessment Focus • How dangerous is he? (What are we worried about?) • What has mother (or others) done to create safety? (What is working? What is not working?) • What additional resources or services can increase physical and emotional safety? (What needs to happen?) Slide # 32

33. Parenting by Men Who Batter • Behavior negatively affects children • More controlling and abusive parenting • Perpetrators involve children in violent events • Continued threats and violence after separation • Good under observation (Bancroft & Silverman, 2002) Slide # 33

34. Why work with the violent partner? • If we don’t, mothers end up being held responsible for everything. This is unfair, ineffective and potentially very dangerous • Working with him can increase safety for the children and their mother • He may be willing to go into a batterer intervention program, and may be able to change his behavior • Fathers who use violence often have both legal and illegal contact with their children Slide # 34

35. Why work with the violent partner? • Development of empathy for his children can be a protective factor against further abuse • He may want to be good father. Positive involvement by a father figure can be very beneficial to children’s development • The mother may want her children to have a safe and healthy relationship with their father • Abuse is a learned behavior and therefore can be unlearned Slide # 35

36. Why hold a separate TDM meeting? • Managed well, a separate TDM can increase safety for the children and their mother • The meeting can provide a forum in which a father can feel heard, and have his role validated • The possibility of children being put into foster care can be a strong motivator for some men • Provides an opportunity for assessing his motivation to change based on the impact of his behavior on his children Slide # 36

37. Why hold a separate TDM meeting? • Facilitator and others can model effective engagement balanced with appropriate accountability for workers • If his family is invited, possibility of expanding the role of the natural support system to help him change his behavior • If the BI program can be at the TDM, making the connection with him at the meeting can increase the odds of him going to the program Slide # 37

38. Key Elements of Safe Practice • Check in with his partner about how to approach him • Use third party information about his violence whenever it is available (police or court report, from family members or friends) • Pay attention for opportunities to use HIS descriptions of his own behavior to explore his violence or the impact on his family • If using information provided by his partner or the children, SAFETY PLAN in advance Slide # 38

39. Key Elements of Safe Practice • Assess his willingness to take responsibility for his behavior. CAUTION: Check what he says against actual behavior following the intervention • Expand network of support to hold him responsible for violence and to support him as he changes his behavior • Keep her informed, and check in with her about safety after contact with him • Create a coordinated response to addressing his behavior with other systems (police, courts, batterer intervention, visitation programs, etc.) Slide # 39

40. www.endabuse.org Slide #40