building bridges to end abuse

1. The FaithLink Project BUILDING BRIDGES TO END ABUSE

3. Beginnings FaithLink grew out of the Calgary community�s efforts to create a coordinated response to family violence.

4. Beginnings Within a Broader Context In 1998, a committee, representing family violence service agencies, the police, legal and justice systems, formed with the intent of developing a response within the justice system. Their goals were aimed at : Changing the behaviour of those who have acted abusively Providing support and safety for those who have been abused Linking justice and treatment services The result was the creation of a specialized family violence court and Homefront, an agency which co-ordinates the various social service, legal and justice systems. Today � on any given day � an average of: 64 cases are before the court (7 of which are women) Recidivism rates have reduced from 35% to 9% Cost savings to the Calgary Justice system is an estimated $9.5 millionToday � on any given day � an average of: 64 cases are before the court (7 of which are women) Recidivism rates have reduced from 35% to 9% Cost savings to the Calgary Justice system is an estimated $9.5 million

5. BeginningsThe Vision One of the individuals involved in this process was The Very Reverend Robert Pynn, the Dean of the Cathedral Church of the Redeemer, Calgary Anglican Diocese. He recognized that a broadly based response to family violence required the involvement of religious/spiritual communities Rev. Pynn and Karen Walroth, the Executive Director of the Action Committee Against Violence, joined forces to explore the possibilities of engaging religious/spiritual communities in becoming a part of the larger community�s co-ordinated response.

6. BeginningsThe Vision Takes Shape A small committee formed and sponsored a workshop that included members of the domestic violence services sector and spiritual leaders to explore the idea. Potential was recognized. A name � FaithLink - was chosen for the initiative The original committee developed into the present Steering Committee of 30+ members, including: Religious/spiritual and cultural leaders (Christian, Jewish and Khmer-Buddhist religious traditions) Women�s shelters Counselling and family violence intervention services Private counsellors Interested individuals The committee continued developing relationships with religious/spiritual leaders and raising the issue of domestic abuse.The committee continued developing relationships with religious/spiritual leaders and raising the issue of domestic abuse.

7. BeginningsThe Vision Takes Shape The work began within the Christian community A part-time co-ordinator was hired By invitation, the work expanded to The Jewish community The Khmer (Cambodian) Buddhist community The Laotian community Others join in the work Steering Committee members included two service providers who were members of the Jewish community. They recruited a Rabbi to the committee. It wasn�t long before they were asking for FaithLink�s help in taking the issue to their community. We hired someone from the Jewish community to begin the work. Similarly, we were approached by spiritual and community leaders from the Khmer and the Laotian communities. A similar model of recruiting someone from each community was followed.Steering Committee members included two service providers who were members of the Jewish community. They recruited a Rabbi to the committee. It wasn�t long before they were asking for FaithLink�s help in taking the issue to their community. We hired someone from the Jewish community to begin the work. Similarly, we were approached by spiritual and community leaders from the Khmer and the Laotian communities. A similar model of recruiting someone from each community was followed.

8. BeginningsThe Vision Takes Shape As the program developed, five areas of focus were defined: Working with religious/spiritual communities to Working with secular service providers to Building collaborative working relationships between spiritual/ethno-cultural leaders and service providers Caring for the caregiver Conducting relevant research More about the specifics of each focus area a bit later in the presentationMore about the specifics of each focus area a bit later in the presentation

9. We Acknowledge Our Funders FaithLink�s activities have been supported by: The federal government The Alberta government The Canadian Women�s Foundation The PrairieAction Foundation The Muttart Foundation The Calgary Foundation Status of Women Canada Private Donors

10. The Work is Important Abuse in Religious/Spiritual Communities Research confirm the long held assumption that family violence is as prevalent within religious/spiritually-based communities as it is within the general population.[1] Nancy Nason-Clark: �where we do have studies of Christian families, the rate of violence does not differ dramatically from the rest of the community.� The Christian Reformed Church in North America reported: 28% of its congregants had experienced at least one form of abuse 12% reported physical abuse 13% reported sexual abuse 19% reported emotional abuse Between 15 and 25% of Jewish households experience violence. 1. Nason-Clark, N. The Battered Wife: How Christians Confront Family Violence. Westminster John Knox Press, Louisville, Ky. 1997. Beaman-Hall, L. & N. Nason-Clark. Partners or Protagonists : The Transition House Movement and Conservative Churches. Affilia. 12(2), Summer, 1997, 176-196. Jewish Women International. �Domestic Abuse in the Jewish Community.� Pamphlet. Jewish Women International. Washington.

11. The Work is Important Abuse in Religious/Spiritual Communities Women of religious/spiritual communities often remain in abusive relationships longer. [2] Victims of violence, however, report the counsel they receive from spiritual leaders has not always been helpful to them.[3] 2. Nason-Clark, N. The Battered Wife: How Christians Confront Family Violence Jewish Women International. �Domestic Abuse in the Jewish Community.� Pamphlet. Jewish Women International. Washington. 3. Giesbrecht, Norman, Irene Sevcik. �The Process of Recovery and Rebuilding Among Abused Women in the Conservative Evangelical Subculture.� Journal of Family Violence.Vol. 15, Issue 3, 2000.

12. The Work is Important Spiritual Leaders are Involved Spiritual leaders are called upon to both intervene in domestic disputes and to counsel those who have been abusive within intimate relationships. In Canada 83.2% of Christian pastors are asked to intervene in domestic abuse related incidents and 70% counsel men who have acted abusively.[4] A Calgary based survey identified spiritual leaders as a first line of contact in the event of experiencing a domestic abuse incident by 16% of respondents.[5] Experience confirms that Rabbis receive disclosures from Jewish women. 4. Nason-Clark, N. The Battered Wife: How Christians Confront Family Violence. Westminster John Knox Press. Louisville, Ky., 1997. 5. Action Committee Against Violence, the United Way of Calgary and Area, the Calgary Injury Prevention Coalition. Survey conducted by Angus Reid, May 1999. Whether they are equipped or not, spiritual leaders are responding to disclosures of abuse. They receive disclosures from victims, from child witnessed and from those who are abusive. They are also called upon to intervene in abusive situations � a dangerous position for them to place themselves in.Whether they are equipped or not, spiritual leaders are responding to disclosures of abuse. They receive disclosures from victims, from child witnessed and from those who are abusive. They are also called upon to intervene in abusive situations � a dangerous position for them to place themselves in.

13. The Work is Important: Abuse and the Spirit We are also becoming increasingly aware of the negative impact the trauma of abuse has on one�s spirit.[6] Abuse strikes at the heart of one�s selfhood, self-concept and sense of the sacred.[7] For victims who place importance on �experiencing� the divine, the emotional numbing that results from the on-going abuse may be interpreted as abandonment by the divine. Others may interpret the abuse itself as divine punishment for past failures and/or actions.[8] The �why me� question � fundamentally a spiritual question � arises. �Concerns about identity, the value of suffering, the importance of justice and the appropriateness of forgiveness [are suddenly front and center]�.Questions of identity proliferate.� [9] 6. Barrett, Mary Jo. �Healing From Trauma: The Quest for Spirituality.� In Spiritual Resources in Family Therapy. Edited by Froma Walsh. The Guilford Press, New York., 1999. 7. Nason-Clark. 8. Toews, John, Eleanor Loewen. No Longer Alone: Mental Health and the Church. Herald Press, Waterloo, Ont. 1995. 9. McKernan, Michael Shane. Radical Relatedness: Exploring the Spiritual Dimension of Family Service Work.The Muttart Foundation, Edmonton. 2004.

14. The Work is Important Abuse and the Spirit Research presently being conducted, of which FaithLink is a partner, suggests [10] For victims, the abuse experience: Results in spiritual brokenness � a sense of disconnection with one�s sense of self and with the divine Engenders feelings of failure, guilt and/or anger when their life experience is not congruent with their religious/spiritual beliefs 10. Rothery, Michael (RESOLVE Alberta), Nancy Nason-Clark (UNB) , Irene Sevcik (FaithLink) Experiencing repeated abuse not only numbs the emotions, it also numbs the spirit resulting in a sense of disconnection from one inner being and from the divine. When there are strong religious beliefs and cultural norms which place the happiness of the family on the wife and mother, there can be a profound sense of failure and guilt when abuse occurs. Additionally, the victim is confronted with the incongruence between the ideal of the family unit and her place within it and the reality of her own life. She is caught between her desire to be obedient/truthful to her beliefs and continuing in an abusive relationship. Often her choice is to stay in the relationship.Experiencing repeated abuse not only numbs the emotions, it also numbs the spirit resulting in a sense of disconnection from one inner being and from the divine. When there are strong religious beliefs and cultural norms which place the happiness of the family on the wife and mother, there can be a profound sense of failure and guilt when abuse occurs. Additionally, the victim is confronted with the incongruence between the ideal of the family unit and her place within it and the reality of her own life. She is caught between her desire to be obedient/truthful to her beliefs and continuing in an abusive relationship. Often her choice is to stay in the relationship.

15. The Work is Important An Existential Conflict The abuse experience raises questions about [13] The value of suffering The importance of justice The appropriateness of forgiveness 13. Rothery, Michael (RESOLVE Alberta), Nancy Nason-Clark (UNB) , Irene Sevcik (FaithLink) These are also questions which spiritual leaders grapple with when faces with the dynamics of family violence. If, at the time of disclosure, they counsel that suffering has a divine purpose, that quick forgiveness of the abuser is expected, not only will the victim not receive appropriate help, she will be left with a sense of injustice. When the victim�s safety is placed as the first priority, exploring the meaning of suffering, justice and forgiveness can be explored in due time. Forgiveness is an important part of the healing process, but needs to be at the victim�s timing. These are also questions which spiritual leaders grapple with when faces with the dynamics of family violence. If, at the time of disclosure, they counsel that suffering has a divine purpose, that quick forgiveness of the abuser is expected, not only will the victim not receive appropriate help, she will be left with a sense of injustice. When the victim�s safety is placed as the first priority, exploring the meaning of suffering, justice and forgiveness can be explored in due time. Forgiveness is an important part of the healing process, but needs to be at the victim�s timing.

16. The Work is Important Spirituality: A Source of Strength Spirituality is a source of strength for victims [11] As a foundation from which other personal strengths important in the healing process can develop Sensing one�s connection to the divine can provide �relief� and �release� of emotional burdens A spiritual perspective provides a broader world view � one in which the abuse experienced can be seen as a part, not the whole, of one�s life experience Spirituality helps answer the �why me� question. 11. Rothery, Michael (RESOLVE Alberta), Nancy Nason-Clark (UNB) , Irene Sevcik (FaithLink) When the connections with one�s inner self and with the divine are regained spiritual strengths can be accessed and can form the basis upon which other personal strengths can develop. There can be a release in the act of �surrendering,� �giving over,� �leaving� the struggle with a higher power. Not only does this �act of surrender� provide a sense of relief from the burden of the current situation, it also infuses a broader life perspective � the abuse experience can begin to be seen as part of one�s life, not the totality of one�s existence. When the connections with one�s inner self and with the divine are regained spiritual strengths can be accessed and can form the basis upon which other personal strengths can develop. There can be a release in the act of �surrendering,� �giving over,� �leaving� the struggle with a higher power. Not only does this �act of surrender� provide a sense of relief from the burden of the current situation, it also infuses a broader life perspective � the abuse experience can begin to be seen as part of one�s life, not the totality of one�s existence.

17. The Work is Important Spirituality: a source of strength Rituals, ceremonial rites and prayers are sources of support and healing. These are practices that are seen by spiritual practitioners as assets, available to them during difficult times, as sources of strength in times of struggle.[12] Spiritual practices provide a framework in which individual experiences can be placed within a wider perspective. Strength is drawn from the realization of new and different possibilities.[12] When secular-based counsellors fail to validate the importance of the spiritual, clients may feel that a vital component of their being and an authentic avenue for coping, healing and change is not being recognized. [12] 12. Nason-Clark. Nason-Clark�s research yielded similar findings. She also notes the importance of service providers to be sensitive to the importance clients may place on the spiritual and its source of strength in their healing process.Nason-Clark�s research yielded similar findings. She also notes the importance of service providers to be sensitive to the importance clients may place on the spiritual and its source of strength in their healing process.

18. The Work is ImportantDenial Is Not Helpful When religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities denial that family violence occurs, victims [14] Face barriers accessing available services Experience lack of support from family and community when they do disclose abuse Placing priority on saving the marriage or the importance of the family � as opposed to safety results in victims remaining in abusive relationships longer than is necessary, at increased risk to themselves and their children 14. Rothery, Michael (RESOLVE Alberta), Nancy Nason-Clark (UNB) , Irene Sevcik (FaithLink)

19. The Work is ImportantBeliefs Matter Beliefs about repentance, forgiveness and reconciliation significantly influence how conflicts are defined and resolved.[15] They influence, for the victim: The decision to disclose the abuse, when and to whom; Whether or not to leave the relationship and if and when to reconcile; Whether to access secular community services; The extent to which the sanctions of the courts are accepted; The degree of commitment given to secularly based intervention regimes. Within some religious traditions, repentance by the abuser is viewed the only step required to end the abuse. Research and experience tells us that changing abusive behaviour is difficult. As current research being conducted by Nason-Clark suggests, the best results occur, notwithstanding a repentant attitude, when spiritual leaders hold accountable the abusing partner to accept court sanctions and to participate in treatment programs. Within some religious traditions, repentance by the abuser is viewed the only step required to end the abuse. Research and experience tells us that changing abusive behaviour is difficult. As current research being conducted by Nason-Clark suggests, the best results occur, notwithstanding a repentant attitude, when spiritual leaders hold accountable the abusing partner to accept court sanctions and to participate in treatment programs.

20. The Work is ImportantBeliefs Matter Within some religious/ethno-cultural communities Roles, responsibilities and boundaries between men and women are often clearly defined. Father-son, mother-daughter relationships, modeling and education may be prescribed. The status of children within the community and their future opportunities for marriage and career success may be jeopardized by a family separation. These beliefs often place men in the dominant position. If this position of authority is abused, relationship patterns are modeled for children which are carried into the next generation. Within some communities, the decision of a woman to leave an abusive relationship may not only affect the current lives of her children � it may have long standing implications, hindering their future opportunities. These beliefs often place men in the dominant position. If this position of authority is abused, relationship patterns are modeled for children which are carried into the next generation. Within some communities, the decision of a woman to leave an abusive relationship may not only affect the current lives of her children � it may have long standing implications, hindering their future opportunities.

21. The Work is Important Community Ties Religious/spiritual communities are just that � communities � providing: Friendships Family Connections Avenues for meaningful volunteer involvement A sense of �mission� and purpose A sense of identity and �place� A source of practical help and emotional support

22. The Work is Important Community Ties Ties can also bind. There may be fear of repercussions to a disclosure, including: Not being believed The disclosure becoming known within the broader community The possible loss of friendships, family connections, support networks Of being isolated from the community Of children losing friends and social supports

23. The Work is ImportantBeing a Preventive Voice Religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities have unique opportunities to combat family violence. They have access to individuals: from across the life span who may be particularly vulnerable to abuse, e.g., children, the elderly, the disabled, members of minority cultures, women and teenaged girls. Spiritual/ethno-cultural leaders can take preventive action to: Speak against family violence Educate their communities about family violence Ensure safety within their places of worship Make information available to members Be alert for signs of abuse among member families

24. The Work is ImportantTaking Practical Action Spiritual/ethno-cultural leaders can: Respond to disclosures of abuse in ways that place the victim�s safety as the first priority Refer victims to specialized resources Hold accountable those who act abusively Expecting compliance with court orders Expecting participation in treatment programs Removing abusers from positions of leadership

25. FaithLink: Areas of Focus With religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities Using community members, FaithLink Raises awareness about family violence by: Speaking to community leaders and groups Developing belief/cultural/language sensitive materials Brochures Training/education manuals Enhances response capacity Developing response protocol Offering training to leaders

26. FaithLink: Areas of Focus With service providers Working with secularly-based service providers, FaithLink seeks to raise awareness about the importance of the spiritual for those clients who come from religious/spiritual communities or who espouse a spiritual life perspective. To this end A workshop curriculum has been developed All-day workshops are offered.

27. FaithLink: Areas of FocusBuilding Bridges FaithLink offers opportunities to connect members of religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities with service providers through Annual conferences Workshops Through these events, participants learn from each other, build relationships and discuss issues of mutual concern

28. FaithLink recognizes the effects vicarious trauma can have on those who work with individuals and families affected by domestic abuse. It seeks to lessen these effects by: Validating the work and related stress experienced by front line workers Providing opportunities for enhanced self-care Training in a centered meditation practice

29. FaithLink: Areas of FocusRelevant Research FaithLink seeks to add to the family violence knowledge base, particularly as it relates to the interface between the spiritual and service providers. It has been involved in two such projects: One explored the effects of a meditation practice on the management of stress for front line service providers; on the counselor-client relationship; and On collegial working relationships The second, a three year joint project with the RESOLVE Alberta, Nancy Nason-Clark, and FaithLink, is exploring: Changes in knowledge of, attitudes towards and responses to domestic violence expressed by spiritual leaders; and Changes in knowledge of, attitude towards an responses to the importance of the spiritual by secular service providers.

30. Lessons learned: Mistrust is deep Spiritual leaders mistrust secular professionals. They fear that: The spiritual will not validated Divorce will be counseled They will be denied access to the victim Service providers mistrust spiritual leaders. They fear that: The victim�s safety will not be seen as the first priority Reconciliation with the abusing partner will be counselled

31. Lessons learned: A Differing Analyses Secular and spiritual wisdom can interpret family violence from different perspectives. Secular wisdom understands family violence as a �power and control� issue Spiritual leaders, while acknowledging that the exercise of power and control are present, often take a broader perspective. Example, within the Christian tradition abusive behaviour may be understood as an expression of sin. These differences do not mean that collaboration is not possible. Both perspectives see family violence as unacceptable. These differences do not mean that collaboration is not possible. Both perspectives see family violence as unacceptable.

32. Lessons learned: On bridging the divide Bridges between secularly-based service providers and religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities can be built. To do so requires: Committed and strong leaders from both the spiritual and secular communities A common vision to drive the process

33. Lessons learned: A clear purpose The issue is family violence and a broad-based community response to it. It is not About re-interpreting sacred texts Ecumenicalism Asking secularly-based counselors to become spiritual counselors

34. Lessons learned: Context and Credibility are Critical Successful work is based on credibility within any given community find someone from within the community/tradition who can speak the language, knows the belief systems and cultural norms, and knows how the community works Find someone who understands the dynamics of family violence and the provision of services that are offered and/or needed.

35. Lessons learned: The Divide Can be Bridged The divide between religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities and family violence serving agencies can be spanned. It requires Time Patience Opportunities for discussion of mutual concerns Awareness raising on both sides Individuals prepared to think and work outside prescribed perspectives

36. The bottom line Individuals who espouse spiritual convictions or are members of religious/ethno-cultural communities and who have experienced abuse should not have to choose between their religious/spiritual/ethno-cultural communities and accessing secularly-based services. We need to work � from both sides of the divide � to ensure that victims, child witnesses, and those who have acted abusively � can access both the deep resources inherent within the religious/spiritual/cultural communities and the expertise that is vested within the domestic violence services sector.

37. Contact Information and Resources FaithLink is a part of The Alliance to End Violence. For information or to access resources, assess: Linda White, Executive Director 306 � 301 � 14 Street NW Calgary, AB. T2N 2A1 403-283-3013 lwhite@endviolence.ca www.endviolence.ca For Jewish Resources, contact: Andrea Silverstone, Jewish Family Services 420- 5920 � 1A St SW Calgary, Ab. 403-287-3510