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Attitudes and the Spiritual Life-018 07-08-07

Attitudes and the Spiritual Life-018 07-08-07. The Enneagram and The Appraisal Process. The Three. Striving to be Outstanding: The desire to stand out as an exemplary member of the group and to be seen as valuable, successful, and accomplished.

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Attitudes and the Spiritual Life-018 07-08-07

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  1. Attitudes and the Spiritual Life-01807-08-07 The Enneagram and The Appraisal Process

  2. The Three • Striving to be Outstanding: • The desire to stand out as an exemplary member of the group and to be seen as valuable, successful, and accomplished. • Appraisal Belief: What gets done is dependent on each person's individual effort. I am rewarded for what I do, not for being who I am. LWBC 07-08-07

  3. The Three • Developing My Self Concept: I learned to get love and approval by achieving success, by working hard to be the best, and by maintaining a good image. I developed a self-driving, move-ahead energy. • My Positive Self Concept: Being personable. Enthusiasm. Leadership. Self-assurance. Being practical, competent, and efficient. Inspiring hope. Poise. • Self Concept Warning: Failing to achieve my desired goals. Being overshadowed by others. Losing face. Uncomfortable feelings and doubts that arise from inactivity and slowing my pace and whatever distracts me from getting things done, including emotions. LWBC 07-08-07

  4. The Three • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on all the things that have to be done: tasks, goals, and future achievements. The most efficient solutions. How to be the best. • Appraisal Attitudes: Getting things done quickly and efficiently. Staying active and busy. Competing. Achieving recognition and credit for accomplishments. Adjusting to whatever is required for success. Promoting myself. Looking good. LWBC 07-08-07

  5. The Three • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): The pressure that comes from basing how good I feel about myself on how much I get done and on status, prestige, and power. Not knowing my real feelings and values. Doing too much. LWBC 07-08-07

  6. The Three • Temptation to Emotional Revolt: Anything or anyone that threatens or thwarts the successful achievement of my goals. Incompetence. Indecisiveness. Inefficiency. Criticism. • My Emotional Revolt: Impatience. Irritability. Occasional outbursts. LWBC 07-08-07

  7. The Four • Striving to be Unique: • The desire to be different, autonomous, creative, and to be understood and appreciated for your special qualities. • Appraisal Belief: I have experienced a painful loss of my original connections, leaving me feeling abandoned and feeling that I am missing something important. LWBC 07-08-07

  8. The Four • Developing My Self Concept: I learned to keep searching for an ideal love or perfect circumstance to make me feel loved, whole, and complete again. I developed feelings of longing and envy for what was missing. LWBC 07-08-07

  9. The Four • My Positive Self Concept: Sensitivity. A creative orientation. Being attuned to feelings. A capacity to empathize with suffering. Intensity. Passion. Romantic idealism. Emotional depth. Authenticity. Introspection. • Self Concept Warning: Intense feelings of sadness and longing, associated with what seems to be missing or lacking in my life. LWBC 07-08-07

  10. The Four • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on what is positive and attractive about the future and the past. What is missing or distant that I long for and feel lonely without. What is aesthetically pleasing and deeply touching or meaningful. • Appraisal Attitudes: What is aesthetically pleasing and deeply touching or meaningful. LWBC 07-08-07

  11. The Four • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): People and experiences not living up to my romantic ideals or desire for intensity. Wanting more than is available. Envying What others have that I do not have or What they are that I am not. Unmanageable feelings, especially in emotional crises. LWBC 07-08-07

  12. The Four • Temptation to Emotional Revolt: People who disappoint me, let me down, or leave me. Remembering such people from my past. Being slighted, rejected, abandoned. Feeling misunderstood. Phoniness and insincerity. • My Emotional Revolt: Fiery outbursts or dissolving into tears. Depression. LWBC 07-08-07

  13. The Five • Striving to be Detached: • The desire to be autonomous, independent, and able to find serenity with your own thoughts. • Appraisal Belief: The world demands too much from me and gives me too little. LWBC 07-08-07

  14. The Five • Developing My Self Concept: I learned to protect myself from intrusive demands and being drained of my resources by becoming private and self-sufficient. I do this by limiting my desires and wants and by accumulating a lot of knowledge. I developed a sense of avarice, but only for things I could not do without. LWBC 07-08-07

  15. The Five • My Positive Self Concept: Scholarliness. Being knowledgeable. Thoughtfulness. Calmness in crisis. Being respectful. Keeping confidences. Dependability. Appreciation of simplicity. • Self Concept Warning: Strong feelings, especially fear. Feeling that people or circumstances are intrusive or demanding. Feelings of inadequacy and emptiness. LWBC 07-08-07

  16. The Five • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on the intellectual domain. Facts. Analysis and compartmentalized thinking. Intrusions or demands on me. • Appraisal Attitudes: Observing from a detached stance. Learning all there is to know about a subject. Thinking and analyzing in advance. Dampening and reducing feelings. Self-containment, withdrawing, conserving. Maintaining sufficient privacy, boundaries, and limits. LWBC 07-08-07

  17. The Five • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): Failing to maintain sufficient privacy, boundaries, and limits. Becoming fatigued. Having desires, needs, and wants that lead to dependency. Trying to learn everything there is to know before taking action. LWBC 07-08-07

  18. The Five • Temptation to Emotional Revolt: Being considered factually incorrect. Demands, intrusions. An overload of emotional input. Not having the opportunity for enough private time to restore my energy. • My Emotional Revolt: Self-containment and withholding. Tension and disapproval. Short bursts of temper. LWBC 07-08-07

  19. The Six • Striving to be Secure: • The desire to be safe and a part of a group, cause, or philosophy; to trust others and your own judgment. • Appraisal Belief: The world is threatening and dangerous, and I just can't trust others. LWBC 07-08-07

  20. The Six • My Positive Self Concept: Trustworthiness. Loyalty. Thoughtfulness. Questioning mind. Warmth. Perseverance. Responsibility. Protectiveness. Intuition. Wit. Sensitivity. • Self Concept Warning: Being helpless or not in control in the face of danger and harm. Getting stuck in doubt and contrary thinking. Alienating people I depend on by contradicting or opposing them. LWBC 07-08-07

  21. The Six • Developing My Self Concept: While I became fearful and doubting and hence learned to be vigilant and questioning… • I also learned to obey authority, to escape perceived threats and dangers, to gain security, and to avoid hazards. (Phobic) • I also learned to defy authority, to battle perceived threats and dangers, to defy security, and to face hazards. (Counterphobic) • Self Concept Warning: Being helpless or not in control in the face of danger and harm. Getting stuck in doubt and contrary thinking. Alienating people I depend on by contradicting or opposing them. LWBC 07-08-07

  22. The Six • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on what could go wrong or be dangerous. Potential pitfalls, difficulties, incongruities. Implications, inferences, and hidden meanings. • Appraisal Attitudes: Doubting, testing, and looking for double messages. Logical analysis to figure things out. Playing the devil's advocate. Ambivalence toward authority. Showing strength. Gaining security by obtaining the goodwill of others, being loyal to others, and dedicating myself to worthy causes. LWBC 07-08-07

  23. The Six • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): The pressure I put on myself in my efforts to deal with uncertainty and insecurity. Difficulties with authority, either excessive obedience or rebellion. Trying to maintain the trust and goodwill of others while experiencing mistrust and ambivalence toward them. LWBC 07-08-07

  24. The Six • Temptation to Emotional Revolt: Untrustworthiness, betrayal. Feeling cornered, controlled, or pressured. Interactions with others that feel too demanding. Others' lack of responsiveness to me. • My Emotional Revolt: Wit. Sarcasm. Biting remarks. Accusations. Defensive lashing out. LWBC 07-08-07

  25. The Seven • Striving to be Excited: • The desire to be stimulated, happy, enthusiastic, and to have fun. • Appraisal Belief: The world limits people, frustrates them, and causes them pain. LWBC 07-08-07

  26. The Seven • Developing My Self Concept: I learned to protect myself from limitations and pain by engaging in pleasurable activities and by imagining many fascinating possibilities for the future. I became a glutton for interesting ideas and experiences. • My Positive Self Concept: Playfulness. Inventiveness. Being enjoyable and upbeat. High energy. Optimism. Love of life. Vision. Enthusiasm. Helpfulness. Imagination. • Self Concept Warning: Frustrations, constraints, and limitations. Painful situations or feelings. Boredom. LWBC 07-08-07

  27. The Seven • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on the interesting, pleasurable, and fascinating ideas, plans, options, projects. Interconnections and interrelationships among diverse areas of information and knowledge. What I want. • Appraisal Attitudes: Enjoying and experiencing life to its fullest. Keeping options open and life upbeat. An active imagination. Being liked (charming and disarming). Maintaining a privileged position. LWBC 07-08-07

  28. The Seven • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): Coping with the overload that results from trying to sample all that life has to offer. Making the same mistakes over and over because of my desire to avoid pain. Making commitments and then feeling trapped by them. • Temptation to Emotional Revolt: Constraints or limits that prevent me from getting what I want. People who are often stuck, unhappy, depressed, or blaming others. • My Emotional Revolt: Brief and to the point. Short-lived. Episodic. Impetuous. LWBC 07-08-07

  29. The Eight • Striving to be Powerful: • The desire to be strong, to take action, and to be able to express your will, power, and vitality. • Appraisal Belief: It is a hard and unjust world in which the powerful take advantage of others' innocence. LWBC 07-08-07

  30. The Eight • Developing My Self Concept: I learned to become strong and powerful by imposing my own truth and by hiding my vulnerability in order to protect myself and others and to gain others' respect. I developed a forceful energy and came to rely on my own instincts. • My Positive Self Concept: Courage. Persistence. Fairness. Decisiveness. Protectiveness. Self-assertion. Intensity. Friendliness. Magnanimity. The ability to energize others. • Self Concept Warning: Being weak, vulnerable, uncertain, or dependent. Losing the regard of people I respect. LWBC 07-08-07

  31. The Eight • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on power and control. Justice and injustice. Deceptions and manipulations. All-or-nothing polarities. Whatever demands action right now. • Appraisal Attitudes: Control and dominance of my space and of the people and things in my space. Taking direct action and facing conflict. Protecting the weak and innocent. Gaining respect by being strong and just. LWBC 07-08-07

  32. The Eight • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): Being unable to correct perceived injustice. Having to contain my confrontational style and having difficulty containing it. Going full-out and denying fatigue and pain. LWBC 07-08-07

  33. The Eight • Temptation to Emotional Revolt: Deceit. Manipulation. People who won't stand up for themselves. Others not responding to me or to what has to be done. Boundaries or rules that are unjust or too constraining. Attempts to control me. • My Emotional Revolt: Powerful anger expressed in direct, confrontational style or armored withdrawal. Balancing the books (revenge). LWBC 07-08-07

  34. The Nine • Striving to be Peaceful: • The desire to be at peace with the world, other people, and your own thoughts; to be calm and relaxed. • Appraisal Belief: The world treats people as unimportant for what they are, and requires them to blend in as the way to experience a sense of comfort and belonging. LWBC 07-08-07

  35. The Nine • Developing My Self Concept: I learned to forget myself and merge with others. I substituted inessentials and small comforts for real priorities. • My Positive Self Concept: Attentiveness to others. Empathy. Supportiveness. Accountability. Steadfastness. Being adaptive. Being accepting. Being receptive. Being caring. • Self Concept Warning: Conflict, confrontation, feeling uncomfortable. Too many competing demands on my attention and energy. LWBC 07-08-07

  36. The Nine • Appraisal Attribution: I focus on others' agendas, requests, and demands. All the things in the environment that beckon. • Appraisal Attitudes: Being sensitive to others and trying to please them. Keeping life comfortable and familiar. Maintaining structure and routine so that life will be predictable. Maintaining peace and quiet. Containing anger. Doing the less essential and comforting activities rather than the more important and more disturbing ones LWBC 07-08-07

  37. The Nine • Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress): Taking a position. Saying no to someone and having that person get angry. Having to make timely decisions and set priorities. Dealing with a commitment I made that I didn't really want to make. LWBC 07-08-07

  38. The Nine • Temptation to Emotional Revolt : Being treated as not important. Feeling controlled by others. Being forced to face conflict. • My Emotional Revolt: Passive aggression, manifested as stubbornness or resistance. Occasionally "boiling over" and exploding. LWBC 07-08-07

  39. 10 Steps to TemptationThe 3 Arenas • Lust of the flesh: • IGHNA Happiness Attainment Motivators: • Sexual Lust • Chemical Lust LWBC 07-08-07

  40. 10 Steps to TemptationThe 3 Arenas • Lust of the eyes: • IGHNA Happiness Attainment Motivators: • Materialism LWBC 07-08-07

  41. 10 Steps to TemptationThe 3 Arenas • Pride of Life: • IGHNA Happiness Attainment Motivators: • Approbation • Power • Religion LWBC 07-08-07

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