Universals of verbal and non-verbal messages.

1. Universals of verbal and non-verbal messages. • “To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” - Anthony Robbins, Motivational Speaker

2. Chapter 6 • Universals of verbal and non-verbal messages. • Assertive Communication

3. Assertiveness: “Win Win” • Steps for increasing assertiveness: • Analyze assertive communications • Rehearse assertive communications • Communicate assertively

4. Assertive Communication • Stand up for yourself • Express feelings directly • Improve relationships • Give Compliments • Give Criticism • Make requests • Say No / Set Limits

5. Universals of Verbal and Non-Verbal Message Non-Verbal Messages are used to: • Accent • Complement • Contradict • Control • Repeat • Substitute For

6. Messages and Meanings Meanings are: • In People • More Than Words and Gestures • Unique • Context-Based

7. Meanings are in People • You do not receive meaning. You create meaning. • Words do not mean. People mean.

8. Meanings are more than words and gestures • Understand other people’s meanings by your perceptions • who you are • what you are feeling

9. Meanings are Unique • No two people derive the same meaning • Same person can derive different meanings on different occasions

10. Meanings are Unique • As you change, you also change the meanings you create out of past messages • Check your perceptions of another’s meanings

11. Messages • Context-Based • Packaged • Rule-Governed • Abstract/Concrete • Politeness • Inclusion/Exclusion • Direct/Indirect • Gender/Culture

12. Messages are context-based • Words or behaviors have different meanings in different contexts • Depends on other behavior that accompanies it • Cultural context

13. Messages are Packaged • Parts work together to communicate a unified meaning • Look at entire package before interpreting another’s meaning • Contradictory verbal and non-verbal messages question credibility and sincerity

14. Messages are Rule-Governed • Grammar • Behavior • Non-Verbal rules and norms

15. Messages vary in abstraction • General terms are abstract and specific terms are concrete • Abstract terms lead to different images • Effective verbal messages usually include specifics

16. Messages vary in politeness • Politeness is a desirable trait • Women’s speech tends to be more polite than men

17. Messages vary in inclusion • Inclusive messages: include all people present and acknowledge relevance of others • Exclusive messages: using language to exclude others outside your group

18. Messages vary in directness Indirect messages

19. Gender differences

20. Cultural Differences • Many Asian and Latin American countries stress indirectness to avoid appear being critical or contradicted as a way to “save face.”

21. Indirectness • Consider how easy it is for misunderstandings to occur.

22. Messages vary in Assertiveness • Nonassertiveness: You win I lose; passive approach to communication • Aggresiveness: I win you lose; caring little for others’ needs

23. Messages Vary in Assertiveness • Nonassertiveness • “You Win, I lose” • Aggressiveness • “I Win, You Lose” • Assertiveness • “I Win, You Win”

24. Assertiveness • I win you win • Act in your own best interest without denying or infringing upon the rights of others

25. Assertiveness • Steps for increasing assertiveness: • Analyze assertive communications • Rehearse assertive communications • Communicate assertively

26. Communicating Assertively • Describe the Problem • State How it Affects You • Propose Solutions • Confirm Understanding • Reflect on Own Assertiveness